SameSame.com.au ~ Inside Out Australia

Gay Ski Week NZ has become a fixture in our winter calender – seven years, and counting. Our man on the mountain, Joshua Crouthamel, reports on the condition of the slopes this year.

29 August to 6 September marked this year’s 7th annual Gay Ski Week NZ in picturesque and aptly named Queenstown. Perfect conditions, the dreamy destination and a BYO-approach to fabulousness resulted in an amazing time, for most. So if you’re into boys that board, lezzies that luge or just want an excuse to wear a cute matching scarf and beanie combo on the other side of the ditch, read on.

Ski Week HQ was the lakeside Novotel, which boasts a fab location and fine-for-the-price accommodation. Packages were available through GSWNZ, but last-minute slash-and-burn rates rampant across the industry also affected the Novotel, so independent bookings were available for a bargain as well.

The hotel lobby’s bar played host to ‘Fag Tag’ nightly. Though convenient as a congregation point, the foyer fell flat as it offered neither tunes nor trannies. Hardcore holiday destinations like Queenstown are used to heavy drinkers, so several on-site in-the-know snowmos either opted for $3 schooners across the street, or arranged in-room duty-free-fueled party starters with their mates. That said, solo skiers were always sure to come across a dozen or more from the pink poles patrol sipping slightly more ‘spensive serves of Sauvignon at ‘le Tag’.

Nightly events ran the gambit, from a red carpet theme to retro bowling, from a cowboy dinner to a closed-door speakeasy-style thumper. As a late-week arrival, I can’t speak personally to these soirees, but come Thursday night my ‘mos and I were there as Kitty Glitter took to the stage as emcee for ‘QUEENStown’s Got Talent: Karaoke’. The vibe was social, the drinks were cheap and the free entertainment fantastic. But Glitter was, according to some, not even much of a lap kitten – a North American stand-in did much of the cat-herding involved in the running of a karaoke night, as well as the announcing, which Kitty seemed to find a drag. Best leave that diva to DJ-ing. But it was a good opportunity to meet the few non-Sydney-sider skiers and have a good old-fashioned gay bash.

Organisers did a good job by offering assorted packages for snowmos with different interests. Keen to carve Coronet Peak off-piste every day? Sorted. Anti-snow and just there for the ‘mo? Not to worry. With a decent mix of event options, punters willing to book packages had plenty on offer. But the independent traveler had a harder time slotting into this year’s Ski Week. If you were a suit with a Sofitel suite, a group of gays that scored a holiday house, or a backpacking-budget bunny just keen to board, then cohesion and community lacked a little.

But all came together on the final Saturday bash: ‘White Out’, the culminating event for every Queenstown snowmo. There the random rural North Island farm boy, the hitherto unseen hottie-with-a-body who stayed in independently-sourced unsanctioned accommodation, a dozen of your favourite topless scene queens from Arq (the ones who are fully-employed and passport-wielding, mind) and a gaggle of unknown gays, got down. It was a great gig, and the highlight for the week for those whose jazz hands didn’t quite take to grasping poles (ski poles, ahem); even mountain aficionados that came for the snow (more so than the ‘mo) praised the party.

Everyone polled said they’d definitely go again next year. Further feedback revealed that GSWNZ needs to buck the exclusively all-inclusive trend and cater more toward ‘mos arriving solo or independent bookings. Though everyone will still be keen to party together by night, and pay for it. There was no Air New Zealand pastel plane flying in and out from Sydney this year. These days, the gays ask more of their pink dollar, and realise they can score a last minute low-cost bargain to save some dosh better spent on a hot toddy with Hot Toddy should they book a late-season fly/drive package, or even just jump on a Jetstar. But regardless of where we stay or who we fly, we want to perve and swerve en masse by night, regardless of the cover charge.

By offering something a little bit different, a whole lot sexy, and an achievable commute (return flights from Sydney cost me $300, my accommodation was just $25 a night, and the Aussie dollar – combined with the Kiwi ‘free pour’ cocktail mentality – resulted in mahoosive nights for pennies on the dollar) the organisers of GSWNZ have a golden gay egg in their hands.

Toss just a tad more glitter at it, GSWNZ, and Snowmo 2010 will be the end-all, bend-all, pink ice rink to top the rest. Gone may be the day of the pink flight package gays, but welcome to the future of savvy snowmos down for something out of the box and, of course, a shimmy (cuz you can take the Sydneysider off of Oxford, but we’re still gonna wanna dance to some trashy music).