Dr Nic married his partner of nine years, Tim, in a gorgeous ceremony taking in Carlton Gardens, the Conservatory at Fitzroy Gardens and the State Library of Victoria.
“I think we were really touched by our friends who flew in from San Francisco, Singapore, Malaysia, Perth, Brisbane, Hong Kong and all over the place,” Tim tells Same Same of the couple’s special day back in April. “We ended up at the airport for an entire morning on Friday welcoming everyone to Melbourne.”
“We’ve been together for about nine years, and got engaged in 2010,” he explains. “Nic had gotten our dog Diesel to bring me this box in his mouth, and I had crouched down to see what it was… and he walked in saying, ‘since you’re down on one knee, might I propose we do something old and yet new for us, something borrowed from the straights… and something that comes in a little blue box’ and I absolutely loved it And yes, I did say ‘yes’!”
For the longest time, the couple thought being engaged was all they wanted – just a private commitment between two people. “But I think seeing my younger brother get married, and watching how his ceremony became a marker in his life and for our family… it was a transition point – where someone moves from being a lover and companion to family. And that was a tremendous realisation for us: that we wanted this for ourselves, something that we never thought possible, and that we were part of this whole group of people who wanted gay marriage to happen.
“We waited for a bit, before I told Nic that I wanted to tie the knot before I turned 30… a deadline!
“There was resistance at first, but my dad coached the entire family into this place where we could take in the sights and find each other anew. It’s a very humbling experience knowing how much kindness got us to that place. We were married by our friend who is a pastor of a gay-friendly church in Singapore – and our pastor from our gay-friendly church in Melbourne was there to cheer us on,” he fondly recounts.
“It seems silly to write this, but knowing that no Asian country supports gay marriage was a huge downer – it feels like the Asian culture is very apathetic to the issue that’s often framed as a very ‘Western’ notion. We would like to say that this is an issue that should mean something to ethnic minorities as well… thank God for Penny Wong!”
The couple kindly shared their personally-written wedding vows with us…
You are my best friend, my lover, my partner, my everything and I love you.
When I am with you, I feel no rain as you are my shelter.
I feel no cold as you are my warmth.
And I will feel no loneliness as you are here with me.
I will give my life for you.
I promise to always protect your life with mine.
I will celebrate with you in times of great joy, but also be your comfort during times of our greatest sorrows. I will cherish your health, but when it fades I will be with you, from now until the day that I die.
One day, which is not too far, we will enjoy great riches, but even if we have nothing, I will always stand by you, and you will always be taken care of.
We will laugh together and we will cry together.
So today, I commit to you in marriage, and to grow with you in mind and spirit and to spend the rest of my life loving you.
My dearest Nic,
We have been wide-eyed wanderers travelling this common road; lost in a conversation that persists each night before we sleep. We are allies in laughter and companions in quieter moments; but most of all, we have been best friends.
The road is long, grey and winding, but my footing is sure, and I will walk this path with you. I will be still to hear your softest whisper, I will ache with the many joys to come our way, I will shake with the depth of our convictions, and I will swim with you against the currents.
And at our end, I will rage against the dying of the light, stop all the clocks, and take up your hand again when this adventure ends for our next great journey.
I love you.
Tim and Nic’s beautiful wedding video is shown below.