No gay party is complete without shoving at least one of these down your throat. Here’s the ten mouth-watering queerest foods and drinks you’ll come across when fine dining.
Flicking through a cookbook or the latest addition to the Golden Circle series and there seems to be a ridiculously large amount of recipes and foods that exist in the world that are just that little bit queer… either strange, oddly shaped or something that every queer you know enjoys swallowing whole.
This here is a list of food and drinks you probably don’t want to be consuming in front of your mother, lest she judge you to eternal damnation for acting a little too camp. Despite some things below being rather typically sexual in shape and design, a great number of us can’t help but have a sip or chew…
Sweet, iced, often covered with finely sliced pieces of fruit… cupcakes are camp. And just like cupcakes, we’re smooth and beautifully shaped on the outside, super fluffy on the inside. Who doesn’t love those super tasty cake-like goodies? You get the picture – we’re just sugar-coating it for you. ;]
Put two of them next to each other and you might understand what I’m referring to. Just dangling there, plump and luscious. Two tiny, tempting orbs you just want to nibble on. It’s not often you’ll see me toying around with my food, but when I’m in a public place and there’s an array of cakes sitting on a table, I’ll always choose the one with a cherry on top. Because it might be the only time during the evening I’ll act sexily enough to get the attention of the hot German waiter.
Soy Chai latte
A latte itself seems a little queer. A chai latte very queer. Though a soy chai latte? The queerest caffeine-filled drink one can order before 9am… though I gather no one who had a big Saturday night would order one of these till the working week kicks off again. Would you like a rainbow M&M cookie with that sir? May as well. May as damn well.
They’re a lightly baked French confection. Coming in a range of colours and flavours, it only seems fair that they’re included on this list. You know why? Because anything you’d find proudly displayed in a shop window in the same city that’s home to pink fairy floss coloured poodles is bound to be super queer.
Need I really say anything here? We all enjoy a cocktail, though nothing screams diva quite like a martini with apple juice. That deathly burning sensation one gets with the Oxford St favourite, Grey Goose Vodka. Add a little something that’s sweet and you’re good to go for a big night out on the scene. I’ll take one for the road dear bartender, shaken not stirred.