Do fuck buddies actually work?

[TeganM3]

So i was just wondering if the whole concept of fuck buddies works? As in can both parties not get attached or develop any feelings! Can you both go out and party and seriously watch the other hook up with someone else with out getting the slighest feeling of jealousy?

Has anyone ever had a fuck buddy and did it work?

[pho3nixphir3]

i kinda did, but it was kinda emotionlly retarded. i'm not the kind that can't get attached by will.

[TeganM3]

i kinda did, but it was kinda emotionlly retarded. i'm not the kind that can't get attached by will.
Yeah exactly! lol.. And to be honest i think that being pure fuck buddies is impossible when you have 2 girls because inevitably one if not both girls will form an attachment! And then there lays the DRAMA!

And not to mention if really messes with your head! I have been there and done it and i am still trying to figure out what the hell happened! hahaha!

[gold_femme]

Do fuck buddies actually work?


yes, totes.

[Dash80]

Yes, yes they do.

[trina2004]

hmm I don't know. I think they work for some people

[Light-Bearer]

For me, fuck buddies work under the following conditions.

I can like my fuck buddy alot and have respect for them and vice versa- but at no point can anyone actually be "inlove" with the other party.

If both people are mature and can communicate their needs effectively- fuck buddies can be awesome and I totally recommend them

[naughtylion]

You get the occasional ones that get attached, but as long as you both know what ur after, yes, they work.

Can be a lot of fun to do stuff with too... kinda like a mate... that sucks ur cock... who wouldn't love that?

[gold_femme]

You totally need to find one that is happy with themselves and thus not needy... It's like live porn you can play whenever you want.. Hot!

[TeganM3]

hahahha...

yea maybe... maybe mine just isnt working! lol...

Its been 6months now and the drama that has come along with it has been insane! But its all going come to an end soon as she goes back to england in a couple of months! lol.....

[sputnik sweetheart]

Most girls are crazy and emotionally, even when they say they aren't. I think it can definitely work BUT gay boys are much much better at it than lesbos are.

[TeganM3]

hahahah...

yes this is SOOO true! ahh girls they do my head in i tell ya! But i love em!

So you had any sucessful fuck buddies

[sputnik sweetheart]

Nah and I have been with my girlfriend for 2.5 years. She is the best ever <3

[bellsforher]

my problem is I can't be with a girl physically, unless i'm with her emotionally as well. I just can't get in the mood with a girl I don't love! My brain just can't handle it.

[gold_femme]

Most girls are crazy and emotionally, even when they say they aren't. I think it can definitely work BUT gay boys are much much better at it than lesbos are.

I know plenty of psycho gay boys! But they do seem to have the ability to disassociate themselves from sex better then alot of women.

Plenty of crazy women out there, but as a good friend once said to me "crazy women will stop being attracted to you when you stop being crazy yourself" I've never looked back since realizing this....

So I think I'm able to manage the fuk buddy stuff cos I'm self assured, know what I want and don't want, and able to spot the right person. Constant communication works and we don't behave like we're in a relationship - we don't do dinner or anything outside the house... And if we see each other out it's just as mates,
no expectation and no crowding.

It's totally possible, as long as you're definitely not looking for a relationship at all.

[TeganM3]

Yeah i think my problem is that my fuck buddy and i spent alot of time together doing couple things lol! Dinners/ movies etc etc...

and then i made the biggest mistake ever i fell inlove with her! lol... stupid stupid stupid! i knew that she wasnt staying in australia and that come june she would go home to england! What i find interesting is that every girl before that has thrown themselves at me saying they wanted a rship i run the opposite direction! but the girl i cant have i fall head over heels for! lol

I am kinda putting it down to the fact that i knew she was leaving so subconsciously i knew that i couldnt get 2 hurt and that i wouldnt be tied down! well thats why i think i did it!

but i have been trying to figure it all out for months now! so am totally open to any other theories on the situation! hahahhah!

[gold_femme]

my problem is I can't be with a girl physically, unless i'm with her emotionally as well. I just can't get in the mood with a girl I don't love! My brain just can't handle it.

That's alright hon, we can't all be filthy whores ;) it suits some of us better than others. I can't be in a relationship ... Different horses for different courses.

[sputnik sweetheart]

I know plenty of psycho gay boys! But they do seem to have the ability to disassociate themselves from sex better then alot of women.

Plenty of crazy women out there, but as a good friend once said to me "crazy women will stop being attracted to you when you stop being crazy yourself" I've never looked back since realizing this....

So I think I'm able to manage the fuk buddy stuff cos I'm self assured, know what I want and don't want, and able to spot the right person. Constant communication works and we don't behave like we're in a relationship - we don't do dinner or anything outside the house... And if we see each other out it's just as mates,
no expectation and no crowding.

It's totally possible, as long as you're definitely not looking for a relationship at all.
Oh I totally agree with you honey!

[just_dance]

I'm with gold_femme on this one. If you know what you want, and stick to it, and have the right 'fuck buddy' it can definitely work. You just have to be careful not to get emotionally involved is all. I myself would find that impossible since, like Bells, I don't get turned on if I'm not in love with the person. I'm just not made that way! lol

As long as you know what you want though, and you make ground rules, you should be fine. Always get out quickly if things start to go pear-shaped. Or at least talk about it if you thing they're going that way

[trina2004]

I'm with gold_femme on this one. If you know what you want, and stick to it, and have the right 'fuck buddy' it can definitely work. You just have to be careful not to get emotionally involved is all. I myself would find that impossible since, like Bells, I don't get turned on if I'm not in love with the person. I'm just not made that way! lol

As long as you know what you want though, and you make ground rules, you should be fine. Always get out quickly if things start to go pear-shaped. Or at least talk about it if you thing they're going that way

good to see you gracing the forums with your presence again;)

[just_dance]

good to see you gracing the forums with your presence again;)

well I have to distract myself from missing my girl too much somehow...

[cornflakegirl]

I have to connect with someone emotionally before I can sexually. So thats a big no from me....... But thats just me, I know a few girls that can do it no worries. :)

[Hessy]

my best friend, who is also my ex boyfriend, is my fuck buddy. it's on a need to fuck basis.
if you're bi, from what i gather, it's a lot easier.

[gold_femme]

i dont reckon it is easier if your bi...it can all go to hell quickly with men or women if you dont have the right boundaries.

but thats just what i think....

[shalayne]

fuck yes i have and fuck yes it works!!!
love u wifey ;)

[star-seeker]

Just a one night stand would be a great start!!!

I did have a 3 some once with two very good friends in Thailand... We've stayed friends, and with one of them, very good friends, but no naughty stuff! She's a good married girl, I'm a naughty married girl... well if I had the chance!

[TeganM3]

fuck yes i have and fuck yes it works!!!
love u wifey ;)
Haha wifey course u have had a fuck buddy that works.. Lol...

N i guess i have 2 lol key is not 2 sleep wid em more than 3 times ;-)

[Vespa86]

I had an wonderfully enlightening experience! Enlightening in the fact that it was amazing and worked for a bit! lol but in the end lack of communication broke the buddy system up! or maybe the fact that her new GF hated me. Wanted to stay friends, but i think her Gf wouldn't have liked it too much!

[mzk68]

I think I could do it succesfully,but Im thinking I would have to like the person but have absolutely no chance of falling for them.Would definately only work for me with certain friendships.
I very very nearly went there with a friend of mine.I was attracted to her physically and definately only emotionally as a friend so would have been no drama there. I know her enough to know she wouldnt get attached in that way either.Definately different for different people.Agree it could go very wrong with some!
If it worked out ok ,the potential for fun would be great,but Im sure nothing like the sex is when there has been deeper feelings there,as there has been with the lovers i have had(which i can count on ...umm 2 fingers) lol

[The Owl]

Never tried this before but I don't think it can work for me. Just like Bells, if I don't have any emotional attachment to the person, I don't think I can do it. But it obviously work differently for different people. I think that's why I can't understand Shane from L Word cos I can't relate to her.

[Tegan-Marie]

they do. if you both know its only sex. for some people, it works reeeeeealy well
however some girls jsut cant do fuck buddies. to many feelings involved.

and fuck buddies with exs, dont work.

[Millie123]

Agree - its about a mind space. If you are looking for a relationship it doesn't work. Ex's never work - its too complicated.

[Zen Girl]

Interesting reading. Particularly as I'm in the throes of one right now and its beginning to get complicated. If only life could be simple...

[mzk68]

Interesting reading. Particularly as I'm in the throes of one right now and its beginning to get complicated. If only life could be simple...

Geez,not 'right now' i hope zen!?:eek:
That would definately make typing difficult!! :rolleyes:

[Zen Girl]

Lmao. I can multi task. <wink>

[Tatsuya]

LAWL XD this thread is getting interesting

[leel]

:rolleyes: No No No. They don't I was in a bi relationship and my male fuck buddy was great to start with then he got all jelous of my and we hardly talk anymore. leel

[Blue-bird]

Ok wat if you dont wanna be fuck buddies? Wat if you want to fuck your buddy just once? It may sound messed up but its one of my closest friends who I've just found out would be with a woman (twist!) and it makes sense to me well logically at least. I havent been with a girl before and it takes me a far while to trust anyone anyway and Im very selfconcious which doesnt help with the trusting. I havent actually talked to her about this at all and she'll most likely turn me down but here's the pro's and con's anyway
CONs- I used to like her and I dont wanna do that again. It could make things awkward for a while.
PROs- I'll know wat Im doing when the right girl comes along. I trust and feel comfortable with her. She doesnt see sex as a big deal so it wouldnt have to mean anything. She's quite attractive
Am I an idiot for thinking this could work or just a creep for thinking about doing my friend?

[cilipadi]

You're not an idiot or a creep BB, but it sounds like it could potentially be really messy - if she's a close friend and you used to have feelings for her and it's your first time - you should probably be really sure that you can keep a detached frame of mind before you go for it.

Also, if one of your main reasons is that you're worried that you need to get experience before you meet your first girlfriend... well, to be honest I don't think you should worry. I can remember being concerned about that, but it never was a problem once I met a girl I liked, and who liked me. It can be quite wonderful to fall in love and to try all these new things.

[Happy to be me]

Hugs Bluebird xo

Well if u both know its just sex and thats it ...its ok.
Really relationships are so hard and if u erase the heart stuff and just have fun why not??

just make sure both know the ground rules...

i used to be so into relationships ...loyal to the point i'd be mistreated...so having some fun no strings may be better??

Big hugs all xoxo

[Blue-bird]

Thanks for the advice girls :)
Im a little worried that I'll want more or fall for her but we kiss occasionally and that hasnt changed anything. And I know we'd never be a couple so I'd keep that in mind.
I got the courage up (drunk enough) to ask her last night and she said yes :) which, even if I dont go through with it, is a huge ego boost! Not only that but she said she'd thought about it and my smile was so big I couldnt speak! :D But I think I'll just see wat happens now Im never any good at making things go to plan anyway

[Happy to be me]

Thanks for the advice girls :)
Im a little worried that I'll want more or fall for her but we kiss occasionally and that hasnt changed anything. And I know we'd never be a couple so I'd keep that in mind.
I got the courage up (drunk enough) to ask her last night and she said yes :) which, even if I dont go through with it, is a huge ego boost! Not only that but she said she'd thought about it and my smile was so big I couldnt speak! :D But I think I'll just see wat happens now Im never any good at making things go to plan anyway

Good luck BB!!

falling for the person is the only problem though...

but,,C'est la vie!
If you never venture from your comfort zone you never experience true life!!

Hugs xo

[Blue-bird]

Its true and Im really gettin over my comfort zone and hey if I do fall in love with her I can always just kill myself? lol

[newbie]

Its true and Im really gettin over my comfort zone and hey if I do fall in love with her I can always just kill myself? lol

Best friend! What ever will i do if you kill yourself?! LOL! Nah seriously, if she says that's she's thought about it before, that's a good sign right? It just seems to have the potential to be really messy. But I suppose you know her, and you know what she's like..

[Happy to be me]

Its true and Im really gettin over my comfort zone and hey if I do fall in love with her I can always just kill myself? lol

Oh hon theres plenty more fish in the sea!
Just have fun ..Pull back every now and then and hang out with others..

Or play the keep them guessing card!
works on guys...sure its same with gals..

Say you are busy when they want you to come over..say you have plans!!

I'd PM you but you've gone all private! :p

[trina2004]

Say you are busy when they want you to come over..say you have plans!!

I'd PM you but you've gone all private! :p

So that's why you said you were coming out thursday night and didn't show? :)

[Blue-bird]

Is my thing really private? Oh dear I'll have to fix that!
Im not really sure wat Im gonna now. Its so weird now, we havent talked about it since and I think I just wanna set a date or forget about it. I just hate not knowing if she's changed her mind or not guess Im gonna have to suck it up and ask. Wish I wasnt such a pansy. And Newbie I'd never leave you alone in this crazy crazy world! :)