Light-Bearer
5th April 2011, 04:24 PM
As it is Youth Week- and this website has been handed over to the sticky little fingers of our twinks and twinklettes- Uncle Light Bearer decided to post this thread to perhaps give you some guidance or perhaps just come on a few of your faces and so forth.
Now go and grab yourself some Jesus Juice, fetch me my pipe and slippers and sit on my knee.
Many people believe that youth is wasted on the young. But what about all the fucking hair spray, ghd devices and hair product???? If you ask me- the whole thing is a fucking glitzy, deluded environmental disaster.
Now- I can hear some of you young kids thinking, " But Uncle Light Bearer- you like to fuck us"
and I will admit- that yes, quite frankly I do- but if you note the above - you will see that I have not included "lube" in the list of wasteful things.
Also- it has to be said- and I'm the man to do so- But whats with all the fucking fringes? Do you seriously think they look good. They are so 1990- and before that 1965. Stop copying your grand dad's hair cut and do something interesting with your lives. The only time these fringes come in handy is bar fights. Many a night I've had to fight my way out of Stonewall holding a twink side ways and shanking the cunts infront of me frantically= yet glamorously.
" Engarde"
When I was young. I busied myself selling heroin and marijuana to the "never do wells" in my suburb. Never in a million years would you have seen me covered in glitter and on a podium. Well you may have- but you would've had to pay good money and then required atleast 4 weeks in surgery.
Has anyone noticed that the word " youth" kinda, sorta rhymes with the word "spoof" - I know the Catholic Church finds it hard to make the distinction.
Anyway back to my point.
Twinks are really cool and are often good to bend into a pretzel, hold down and seriously just fuck the shit outta of.
But step away from the fucking key board and stop swishing your fringes at me- with your doey little eyes and lean supple bodies.
I'm trying to fucking eat.
Now go and grab yourself some Jesus Juice, fetch me my pipe and slippers and sit on my knee.
Many people believe that youth is wasted on the young. But what about all the fucking hair spray, ghd devices and hair product???? If you ask me- the whole thing is a fucking glitzy, deluded environmental disaster.
Now- I can hear some of you young kids thinking, " But Uncle Light Bearer- you like to fuck us"
and I will admit- that yes, quite frankly I do- but if you note the above - you will see that I have not included "lube" in the list of wasteful things.
Also- it has to be said- and I'm the man to do so- But whats with all the fucking fringes? Do you seriously think they look good. They are so 1990- and before that 1965. Stop copying your grand dad's hair cut and do something interesting with your lives. The only time these fringes come in handy is bar fights. Many a night I've had to fight my way out of Stonewall holding a twink side ways and shanking the cunts infront of me frantically= yet glamorously.
" Engarde"
When I was young. I busied myself selling heroin and marijuana to the "never do wells" in my suburb. Never in a million years would you have seen me covered in glitter and on a podium. Well you may have- but you would've had to pay good money and then required atleast 4 weeks in surgery.
Has anyone noticed that the word " youth" kinda, sorta rhymes with the word "spoof" - I know the Catholic Church finds it hard to make the distinction.
Anyway back to my point.
Twinks are really cool and are often good to bend into a pretzel, hold down and seriously just fuck the shit outta of.
But step away from the fucking key board and stop swishing your fringes at me- with your doey little eyes and lean supple bodies.
I'm trying to fucking eat.