Should I be depressed

[john_Rocks99]

Okie Dokes I am 16 and fully aware that i'm gay, it doesn't upset me much. The only thing is that I can't talk about it, whenever someones makes a gay reference I get angry at them, or I walk away, I can't talk about it with my family, I can't talk about it with my freidns (mostly casue they just think they know everything) I dont have any gay friends. It just makes me so upset that people are so quick to judge too. I try not to show it at school and stuff cause people will ask me whats wrong, and if I explain it to them they say something corny or obvious.

I guess I just really want someone to be able to share my emotions with. Someone that will understand that it isn't easy.

I haven't FULLY come out, usually if people ask I just say whatever comes to my head, and I dont really care all that much if people know. The only support I get is from myself disappointingly enough. This is my main problem, the emotions bottled inside me making me crawl and squirm trying to get out.

I just wanna meet someone.


bah

[Ash Rehn]

Okie Dokes I am 16 and fully aware that i'm gay, it doesn't upset me much. The only thing is that I can't talk about it, whenever someones makes a gay reference I get angry at them, or I walk away, I can't talk about it with my family, I can't talk about it with my freidns (mostly casue they just think they know everything) I dont have any gay friends. It just makes me so upset that people are so quick to judge too. I try not to show it at school and stuff cause people will ask me whats wrong, and if I explain it to them they say something corny or obvious.

I guess I just really want someone to be able to share my emotions with. Someone that will understand that it isn't easy.

I haven't FULLY come out, usually if people ask I just say whatever comes to my head, and I dont really care all that much if people know. The only support I get is from myself disappointingly enough. This is my main problem, the emotions bottled inside me making me crawl and squirm trying to get out.

I just wanna meet someone.


bah
I don't know if you have seen this but Queensland Association for Healthy Communities have a factsheet that lists some links and stuff that might be helpful. I've copied the link here:

http://www.qahc.org.au/files/shared/docs/fs_whatsoutthere.pdf

There's also a service call Open Doors in Brisbane that is specifically for people up to 18 years old who are exploring / identifying as gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender...

www.opendoors.net.au

They might have safe/ social opportunities for you to meet other people who are experiencing similar stuff- I get a sense that you would like to express some of these emotions so they aren't all bottled up- bottling up can feel depressing! Making the first call or turning up to an event for the first time can be a difficult step, but as you can see from posting this message, it's also a good way to get information / support.

I'm not sure what there is available on the Gold Coast these days but Open Doors or QAHC should be able to tell you if there is something.

I hope your search for support goes well and turns up a few good options.

[sneakos]

hey john

hope th links ash gave are useful - i dont have anything more to add really other than to say:

welcome to samesame and i can recall the difficulty of being 16, and whilst i dont pretend to know your situation, that you are actively reaching out and asking questions is so good

cyber hugs and thoughts are with you :)

pete

[robbie]

hey John, it's a tough time when you realise you are gay and you want to talk to someone. I begin to recognise as being gay around then but it took me a few years to finally speak to people about it. You'll get there mate.. use those links and I'm sure you will find other like minded people who you can identify with. Best of luck.

[kelloggs]

hello, this is maria. I am a 33 y.o. bysexual mother of two boys who came out of the closet about a year ago. You are very brave to come out, your integrity is something nobody can ever take away from you and I wish I had always acted following my heart and my thoughts, like I do now, and not waited 33 years of misery to do so.

You are closer to happiness than you realise. The first and most important step you have done it already: love yourself. You are unique. There will never be anyone else like you, with your face, body, emotions, thoughts, and what is more important: whatever you do in this life, it is only you who can do it. Anything you do, and anything you do not do, never anyone else will do it or be able to finish it in your behalf quite like you would.

You do not need anyone. You can live by yourself and survive. Now... this particular person you are looking for that will share your time and make life improve from a good day to a beautiful day is there looking for you right now. Get out of your comfort zone. Invest on improving yourself, and you will find yourself surrounded by interesting people, and one of them will be the one that you are looking for. It is not a promise, it is a fact of life. Make it a matter of fact.

[bellsforher]

heyJohn, wow, it's like looking at me at 16!
I too was kind of ok with being a lesbian from a pretty young age, I just felt sad I couldn't say it at school. I wish i had now because i was a bit of an outcast anyhow so what difference would it have made? It's a bit frustrating that you can't just say, "hey guys, I'm gay". Because people will still overreact.

All I can say is that you'll only get support here, if only this was around when I was 16 (which was er...1995? Scary).

It's true, you do need to support yourself, you know who you are, you know you like who you are. That's a pretty good start. Most of us NEVER figure that one out!

Can i just say, as i found out after I left school, half my friends (the good ones) knew I was a lesbian anyhow. I could've wrung their necks! It would have helped a LOT if they had just said, hey, we know, and we're fine with it. So don't underestimate your friends - they may just not know how to approach it if they do guess you're gay, and maybe they would love to support you on it.

[john_Rocks99]

Thanks to everyone who posted I read them all, and did take to heart alot of what was said. I am very grateful to have a site like this and the support is brilliant. Makes my heart happy:)

[Tim D]

Hey mate,

It does take a while to come to terms with it, but trust me, it will happen. 16 is a relatively young age to acknowledge it, but I think that it's an amazing thing that you're dealing with it now.

Personally, the whole gay thing didn't quite click with me 100% until I met a group of mates who were - shock, horror - really normal and really cool. I still remember going to the beach with this group when I was pretty young, they were all gay and we all just sat around talking about nothing much in particular, but I came to the realisation that you can be gay and normal and fun and live an amazing life. As soon as I discovered that, it's all been uphill from there.

It's pretty natural to be confused and relatively down during this time, but it does get better and it's all about connecting with a guy, or a group of other gay guys and that support is just invaluable.

[natejd87]

Hey man!! stay strong and you'll get through it just fine!!
We're all here for you cause all of us have been through the same thing!!

[dreadcircus]

Okie Dokes I am 16 and fully aware that i'm gay, it doesn't upset me much. The only thing is that I can't talk about it, whenever someones makes a gay reference I get angry at them, or I walk away, I can't talk about it with my family, I can't talk about it with my freidns (mostly casue they just think they know everything) I dont have any gay friends. It just makes me so upset that people are so quick to judge too. I try not to show it at school and stuff cause people will ask me whats wrong, and if I explain it to them they say something corny or obvious.

I guess I just really want someone to be able to share my emotions with. Someone that will understand that it isn't easy.

I haven't FULLY come out, usually if people ask I just say whatever comes to my head, and I dont really care all that much if people know. The only support I get is from myself disappointingly enough. This is my main problem, the emotions bottled inside me making me crawl and squirm trying to get out.

I just wanna meet someone.


bah

John. Firstly thanks for having the courage to post such personal feelings. You are already on the way my friend. Just by posting here has put you in contact with people showing there are plenty of us out there no matter where we fit on the GLBTQI spectrum, we all have had to come out at some stage. My only suggestion is to remain true to yourself and continue reaching out to people. You will be surprised who has issues and who doesn't. Sometimes the peple you think will be ok aint and vise versa. Plus when you come out there will always be someone else who dumps a bombshell on you which you never saw coming. Some people react badly whereas other accept and then unleash a secret they have been carrying for as long as you.

Just by making contact you are opening doors to change, throwing yourself out into the universe and more than likely will find a few like minded people and before you know you are out, loud and proud marching up oxford st for Mardi Gras.

Goodluck, I'm sure you will shine brighter than any star :)

[GenesisInVain]

hey there john. you seem to have such confidence at that age,that i never possessed. give yourself a pat on the back for that.

i know this might sound cliche but i suggest that you take baby steps. you are quite young but oh so full of energy (ready to face the big bad world), you just have to have faith in yourself. and the same same community is definitely here for you.
its a wonderful place to learn about yourself, learn about others etc just give it time and as jade said, you will shine so bright!