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How do I tell my parents?

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JarrodJ +

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Default How do I tell my parents?
You could always do what I did, accidentally leave your Facebook open on your Dad's computer, complete with relationship status and profile picture of me and my bf cuddling.
Phazz +

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Default How do I tell my parents?
I think my dad was suspicious when i fell asleep a few times at my pc with manhunt and xtube open. When I officially came out somehow he wasn't surprised.
local_warming +

i just want it to be warm where i am

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Quote:

Originally Posted by Phazz View Post

i fell asleep a few times at my pc with manhunt and xtube open.

dedication phazz!
Tosca +

urgh, im cold. oh yeah, im back as well! yay for me

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Originally Posted by JarrodJ View Post

You could always do what I did, accidentally leave your Facebook open on your Dad's computer, complete with relationship status and profile picture of me and my bf cuddling.

thats one way to do it.
silver_lavender +

is neither nice nor down to earth.....

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Default How do I tell my parents?
I’m currently having issues with my bro, i think he’s in denial. Because he keeps doing the whole, “you need a girlfriend.....so when are you getting a girlfriend?” It’s like, don’t fuck with me. I know you know; I’ve never shown any interest in girls. But you what, I’m like, if he wants to believe a lie that’s his problem. I’ve done nothing to suggest I was straight, except become very awkward when any mention of girls arises.
Lazzarus +

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Back in my day porn was printed... on paper. Worked then :P
I want to live in a world where a chicken can cross the road without having its motives questioned.
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Quote:

Originally Posted by local_warming View Post

dedication phazz!

oh totes!!
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RadisCarpis +

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Default How do I tell my parents?
My Father came into the room during the opening theme of Friendship is Magic. Do I still have to tell him?
prezben +

beige

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Quote:

Originally Posted by RadisCarpis View Post

My Father came into the room during the opening theme of Friendship is Magic. Do I still have to tell him?

Hahahaha!

The Dawson's Creek equivalent
ammonite +

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If you have good reason to believe that coming out may cause you to be thrown out of home or put you in physical danger, then it is a good idea to wait until you have some independence of your own. If you can wait until you have moved out or are able to support yourself financially then you should seriously consider this.

what if that never happens?
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Quote:

Originally Posted by ammonite View Post

what if that never happens?

Then I suppose those people have made their beds. They don't get to know who you are and that's a shame for them.

Is it painful? Damn right but you can't change some people's minds and thus there is no point trying.
ammonite +

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i'm not sure if i made sense?...

i meant what if you never achieve independence or move out or become able to support yourself financially?
twinstar +

feels like someone has punched him in the throat. No-one has though....

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Default How do I tell my parents?
Coming out is over-rated. Yeah - I don't really have much more to say.
ammonite +

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why do you think it's over-rated?

elmo looks like he's enjoying that
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beige

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Quote:

Originally Posted by ammonite View Post

i'm not sure if i made sense?...

i meant what if you never achieve independence or move out or become able to support yourself financially?

I understood what you were saying - I meant that you have to come out only when it is safe to do so and with some people it will never be possible. So if you're closeted to your family but out to the rest of the world then you wouldn't be the first person
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Try a singing telegram?
ammonite +

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Quote:

Originally Posted by prezben View Post

I understood what you were saying

i thought so but then i confused myself.

Quote:

Originally Posted by prezben View Post

I meant that you have to come out only when it is safe to do so and with some people it will never be possible. So if you're closeted to your family but out to the rest of the world then you wouldn't be the first person

Quote:

Originally Posted by prezben View Post

Then I suppose those people have made their beds. They don't get to know who you are and that's a shame for them.

Is it painful? Damn right but you can't change some people's minds and thus there is no point trying.

thanks a lot for this. you've really made me feel a bit better.

Last edited by ammonite: 30th October 2011 at 07:04 PM

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beige

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Glad I could help ammonite even if in a small way.

This road is never easy for any of us even under the best circumstances. You need positive people around you. Your heart will be broken by more than one person but those who really matter will stay or will appear.

Chin up. PM me if you just feel like a rant or anything I might be able to help with!
ammonite +

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NATEE +

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Default How do I tell my parents?
Shannon mate you sure know how to put the cherry on top of the cake :)
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beige

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Found this from actor Chad Allen in an article he wrote:

"I have long held the belief that those of us who are gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender have been given an extraordinary gift. We are forced to go inside ourselves and determine, once and for all, that we are good. If we have anything at all to give the world, we are going to find it somewhere along that journey. We are going to show it to the world in a declaration of brilliant defiance against society and its rules. We only go looking because our sexuality forces us to. How lucky are we? But, it’s easy to forget the pain that forces us to go searching in the first place."
nvek69 +

spreading blasphemous rumours

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Default How do I tell my parents?
I had myself pre-assigned into the "thrown out of home" category. I had a bag packed and my boyfriend on standby at his place just in case I needed to call him from a public phone (remember those?) to come and pick me up. Fortunately I wasn't kicked out - THAT day. Being forced to leave home was the eventual result of my coming out though and luckily enough I still had the boyf on standby to take me in. I've never regretted my decision for a second, and in fact it was my parents who came to me some years later apologising and expressing their sincere regret for everything that went down.
What if I hadn't had the boyfriend though? I can't imagine. The advice I've always given to people who've asked me has ultimately come down to: hope for the best, but always have a "Plan B" just in case.
Hessy +

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Default How do I tell my parents?
be prepared for them to call it a phase. my phase has been going on for quite a while now...
Cyclone55 +

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My Dad came to visit me from overseas this year for the first time. He was the only one of my immediate family not to know, I thought his views were a bit old fashioned and might not take it well (I remember some of the things he used to say about poofters and the like as I was growing up). To be a good host I offered him the 2nd bedroom, while I slept (as per usual) with my boyfriend. By the end of the visit he only had good things to say about my boyfriend (who to be fair seemed to be able to tolerate some of Dad's funny mannerisms far better than I ever could, and they got on really well), and ended saying how glad he was to see me here having such a good life, with him. This nearly brought a tear to my eye. I never had to initiate any kind of coming out conversation, there was no need for deep conversations about it. My Dad now even calls my boyfriend for a chat every now and then. Don't know what I was worried about.

Last edited by Cyclone55: 26th November 2011 at 04:46 PM

Asherbella +

Follow your passions, enrich your heart, embrace peace - make the shadows depart

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Tell them how you feel honestly, reassure them that being gay isn't a phase, it isn't a choice; that being a homosexual is a state of being - just as being born with blue/hazel/brown eyes is merely a genetic imprint. Would you condemn your Dad for needing to wear prescription glasses? No. Would you hate your Mum for having curly blonde hair? No. So why should your parents dismiss you for being aroused by and wanting to pursue a romantic relationship with a person of the same gender as you? Love is the meaning of life and the capacity to love another human being supercedes the gender to which you're attracted to. Love cancels out bigotry any day of the week.
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