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Discussion & Support Group for Bisexuals

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JustDax +

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Default Discussion & Support Group for Bisexuals
Hey Melbournites,

I take great pleasure in announcing the inaugural meeting of the Peninsula Bi Chat group on Thursday 8th March 2012 at a venue located on the Mornington Peninsula.

The group is open to all bisexual people, their friends, loved ones and supporters. Those questioning their sexuality are also welcome and may benefit from this opportunity for fellowship with like-minded individuals where all things bisexual are discussed openly and frankly.

The group meets monthly on every second Thursday. The group is run by a facilitator, and has a simple set of rules to make sure everyone feels safe. We start at 7:30, have a short break around 8:30, and then continue through to finish around 9:30. We talk about whatever is important to the attendees that night; sometimes people have questions, or they want to talk about the things going on in their lives, or listen to the stories of others.

The Peninsula Bi Chat group is an offshoot of the Melbourne Bi Chat group which has been running successfully now for several years, currently out of Carlton. The facilitator for the Peninsula Bi Chat group is also a regular attendee of the Melbourne group, and has long recognised the need to make this type of support available at a regional level, hence the formation of Peninsula Bi Chat.

The facilitator is also a committee member of Bi Alliance Victoria, a non-profit volunteer-run organisation dedicated to promoting the acceptance of bisexuals in GLBTI and mainstream society, providing a fun, safe space where bisexuals can meet, make friends, and talk about their experiences, and informing the bisexual community about relevant news and opportunities for activism.

If you are interested in attending the Peninsula Bi Chat group, are perhaps a little nervous about coming along, or just have a question please contact the group facilitator (Rowan) on 0437 199 271 or rdax@netspace.net.au. Anyone planning to attend is requested to make contact in advance for venue details.

Those who may be interested in attending the Melbourne Bi Chat group click on this link for details:
http://www.bi-alliance.org/?page_id=37

Cheers,
Rowan.
sesame +

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A group of nonexistant people.
JustDax +

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Quote:

Originally Posted by sesame View Post

A group of nonexistant people.

....and this reply is exactly why a group of this nature is required....
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Quote:

Originally Posted by JustDax View Post

....and this reply is exactly why a group of this nature is required....

So a hypothetical discussion can be made. Like heaven and hell?
JustDax +

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I get that you have an alternative view. Please feel free to move along and leave this thread to those who relate and could potentially benefit from it.
sesame +

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its like agnostics and non practising christians.
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Hi sesame,

I'd suggest that your comments are in breach of the samesame Code of Conduct that you agreed to when you signed up - specifically:

Section 1: Respecting Other Users
1. We encourage everyone to treat each other with mutual respect. Do not use the Community Services to threaten, harass, stalk, or abuse others participating in any Community Service. Refrain from all expressions of bigotry, racism, sexism, hatred, homophobia, heterophobia or excessive profanity. Be courteous to others, even if your opinion differs from theirs.
2. Do not make inflammatory remarks in order to provoke others.

Please take your intolerance elsewhere.

Last edited by bluebec: 20th February 2012 at 07:01 PM

Reason: corrected formatting

Matt Akersten +

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I'm sure sesame is only joking. Certainly bisexual people exist and as an LGBT site they are welcome here and should be respected. xx
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Quote:

Originally Posted by bluebec View Post

Hi sesame,

I'd suggest that your comments are in breach of the samesame Code of Conduct that you agreed to when you signed up - specifically:

Section 1: Respecting Other Users
1. We encourage everyone to treat each other with mutual respect. Do not use the Community Services to threaten, harass, stalk, or abuse others participating in any Community Service. Refrain from all expressions of bigotry, racism, sexism, hatred, homophobia, heterophobia or excessive profanity. Be courteous to others, even if your opinion differs from theirs.
2. Do not make inflammatory remarks in order to provoke others.

Please take your intolerance elsewhere.

Bollocks. How come ernesto-1 and MrAsh still here then?
trina2004 +

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Support group? Discussion?
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Quote:

Originally Posted by Matt Akersten View Post

I'm sure sesame is only joking. Certainly bisexual people exist and as an LGBT site they are welcome here and should be respected. xx

I'm not convinced that sesame is only joking. Regardless of whether sesame is joking or not, the comments made are biphobic and harmful to others who may come along to read this thread due to interest in the discussion group as they may feel that yet again their identity is being questioned/disregarded.

Biphobia is harmful, bi erasure is harmful. It's time that the same respect that is given to those who identify as gay or lesbian is given to those who identify as bisexual. It is not a phase, it is not being greedy, it is not wanting our cake and eating it too. Bisexuality is a valid sexual orientation, and it's time that biphobic comments such as sesame made at the beginning of this thread were no longer tolerated.
trina2004 +

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Cause bisexuals have it sooo hard.
Irene +

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I'd say that bisexuals have the best of both worlds.
I just don't see the need for a support/discussion group. I'm genuine in saying that. Other than dumb comments like Sesame's, what issues affect bisexuals that don't affect gays and lesbians? I suppose you could have someone in a heterosexual domestic situation, who likes a bit of gay action on the side, or vice versa, and consequent problems at home. Is that basically it, or is there more? I'm willing to learn.

Last edited by Irene: 20th February 2012 at 11:37 PM

badtrany +

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gay and lesbian people know what gender they want for a partner being bi makes it so hard to settle down with 1 person you never feel satisfied sexualy.
twoten85 +

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Quote:

Originally Posted by badtrany View Post

gay and lesbian people know what gender they want for a partner being bi makes it so hard to settle down with 1 person you never feel satisfied sexualy.

You took the words right out of my mouth I was totally thinking the same thing.
It’s like I’m a gay salmon fighting for my life in a river of bears

"Men should be like Kleenex, soft, strong and disposable." - Cher.

Reductive, look it up! - Madonna
DexX +

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Why do bisexuals need a discussion group where they can talk about their lives without feeling judged or criticised?

"A group of nonexistant people."

"Cause bisexuals have it sooo hard."

"being bi makes it so hard to settle down with 1 person you never feel satisfied sexualy."

"I was totally thinking the same thing."

That's why.

Someone posts a notice here, on a supposedly safe forum, and the responses are instantly flooded with this kind of crap. Bisexuals go anywhere in the queer space, and they will be told that they don't exist, that their orientation is a fraud, that they are untrustworthy, that they don't know what they want, that they haven't made up their minds, and so on and so on and so on.

Can you imagine what that's like for someone who's trying to come to terms with their sexuality?

Best of all, when we point out what's being done to us, people tell us we're over-reacting, that people are "just joking", and of COURSE we're accepted... or we would be if we'd just be honest and come out as properly gay...

This is why groups like this are needed.
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well i've never met a "bisexual" in my life.

/:
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or a "guardian angel" for that matter!
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Quote:

Originally Posted by Matt Akersten View Post

I'm sure sesame is only joking. Certainly bisexual people exist and as an LGBT site they are welcome here and should be respected. xx

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Matt, are you aware that something can simultaneously be both a joke and offensive? "Offensive joke" is not exactly an oxymoron.
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yes it's like joking about straight people.
Barrin +

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Quote:

Originally Posted by badtrany View Post

...being bi makes it so hard to settle down with 1 person....

That assumes everybodies ideal is to "settle down" (hate that term!) with 1 person.
It's a false assumption.
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DexX, ignore sesame. I think others are trying to understand the issues. If you don't agree with for instance what badtrany said (which I thought made a lot of sense), please explain. How can we know otherwise, unless people like you educate us? Or is the main issue that you're not accepted by part of the LG community?
badtrany +

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Quote:

Originally Posted by Barrin View Post

That assumes everybodies ideal is to "settle down" (hate that term!) with 1 person.
It's a false assumption.

thats how I feel so it is true for ME!
JustBecause +

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Quote:

Originally Posted by trina2004 View Post

Cause bisexuals have it sooo hard.

Would you be in a relationship with a bisexual Trina?
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So DexX is criticising you (badtrany) for how you feel about being bi? Geez!

Last edited by Irene: 21st February 2012 at 12:01 AM

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Irene, I have been active in the bisexual community for going on nearly a decade now, with quite a lot of that time in leadership positions. It's just awful how many people have come to dedicated bisexual social and support groups and told me that they first went to a gay group or two, looking for understanding and support, but instead were told they simply did not exist. Many times they would be greeted warmly, offered support, and told that the community would be glad to support them while they worked out that they were actually gay. They would say that no, they were really bisexual, and they would be laughed at.

I have met dozens of people who have been through this. I've met others who have been through worse. I can recall at least three female friends of mine who were part of lesbian communities when they realised they were actually bisexual, not lesbian, and entire circles of friends have deserted them like they have a contagious disease.

This Pride March just gone was notable for being the first in which I have marched and have not received any biphobic heckling. Five or six times before that I've marched, and every time there were nasty things shouted by people in the crowd. At an event celebrating the diversity and strength and acceptance of the queer community, people thought it was appropriate to yell anti-bisexual comments at us.

Things are changing, but I'm still very grateful that there are explicitly bisexual-friendly groups out there where people can talk about who they are and how they feel without being laughed at, criticised, or just told flat out that they're wrong about who they are.
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Uh, pretty sure Trina was being sarcastic and suggesting that bisexuals don't have it hard and therefore we don't need support groups. Happy to be corrected, though.
JustDax +

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To add to DexX's excellent post - a sense of community is crucial to all the components of the queer rainbow. Many bisexual people, especially those currently partnered with someone of the opposite sex, have great difficulty connecting with other similar individuals. The bisexual community is nowhere near as defined, visible or well catered for as the Gay/Lesbian communities. Groups such as Melbourne Bi Chat and Peninsula Bi Chat offer many bisexual people a chance to finally connect and discover that there is a safe place where they can just be themselves.
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I've found there are a lot of gals out there who claim to be lesbian, yet still LOVE the disco stick. I don't see why they just accept they're bisexual.

I was at a birthday party for the partner of a lesbian work colleague years ago at Stonewall and a few of her friends were getting on with each other and these guys who were like their groupies. One infact apparently after years of being straight came out as gay, yet you could tell he was bi-sexual. The disgusting thing was that one of the women tried to erotically kiss me, it was just disgusting, I still cringe at this white fair haired skippy chick trying it on. I'm dry reaching right now.
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