I've come out to most of the people in my life that I feel I want to, except my mum. They were all through letters or texts though. It's still a really hard thing for me to say aloud.
And as for my mum, I still don't want to tell her just yet. I don't know how she'll respond.
But despite all that, I'm in a pretty good place with it all And everyone I've come out to has been great about it.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dragon Fae King

Good for You! <3 You sound like You're in a Strong place to be ready, so it will go well... I send some Positive Warm Energy Your Way

Aww thankyou, I am trying to be positive of the world, but not nieve either of the negativity in the world.

I had just met this guy who was gay, and Idk why, but I got really nervous and I was shaking uncontrollably when I told him I was gay too, I wasn't worried about anybody around hearing it, I guess it was because he was the first gay guy I had confronted, but I am glad I did it, and his friend was trying to calm me down. lol

yay bobbi

Oh, I remember the first time coming out to other gay people! Was a bit scary. But mine was an unhelpful experience though because they weren't very welcoming as they thought I was straight by the way I looked.... :/

39 years old... Two weeks ago... I got my family together for a face-to-face and said... "The next time you see me with someone it will probably be a gurl and not a boy. I have been fighting this forever hoping that it wasn't true but it is. I can't hide from it anymore so now I need to get out there and see what it's all about. There are not too many secrets in our family and I wanted to tell you because I will be going out more and meeting new people. I can't lie to you about where I am going and who I am with. I have to tell you now because you are my family and you are the people I am closest to and I need you to be there."
I haven't had a proper relationship for ten years... in the last two months I have been losing my hair more than normal and then my Dr sent me to a shrink... which I believed I didn't need to see but it worked out well. Mum and Dad could see what it was starting to do to me and I needed to come clean. They haven't treated me any differently. I was scared my Mum would cry every day for the rest of her life and my Dad would say penance for me every day for the rest of his life but they and my brothers are good... and I'm grateful for that. See what happens when I introduce them to a gurl!
So now I just need to get out there... suggestions???

LESFUC! Go paintballing this Sat and meet some of the girls, they're all awesome!

How to come out with the littlest effort possible:
1) Tell someone with a big mouth
2) Go watch an episode of The L Word. Because that's about how long it will take for everyone to find out

Seriously though, I did the above for telling all my random friends who I'm not that close to, because I didn't think it was that important that they know, but I was tired of having conversations that would become slightly weird when anything relationship or lesbian related came up.

And I wasn't worried about telling my close friends. I knew they wouldn't judge me for it, and I was pretty excited that I had finally figured it out, so I pretty much just called everyone up and said 'Guess what? I'm gay!'

Still haven't told the super-religious African parents yet though. I'm going to wait till I finish uni and have a job so can support myself, since I don't feel like trying to finish uni while homeless and poor.

Quote:

Originally Posted by kaz11

How to come out with the littlest effort possible:
1) Tell someone with a big mouth
2) Go watch an episode of The L Word. Because that's about how long it will take for everyone to find out

... I'm going to wait till I finish uni and have a job so can support myself, since I don't feel like trying to finish uni while homeless and poor.

That's a horrible situation for you, Kaz It makes me feel a little ridiculous for feeling that my situation is prittttyyy shittty. A very wise and rational decision to tell them you're a bit gay when you are independent.

I wish you luck, Kaz.
c:

Quote:

Originally Posted by rubytunes

39 years old... Two weeks ago... I got my family together for a face-to-face and said... "The next time you see me with someone it will probably be a gurl and not a boy. I have been fighting this forever hoping that it wasn't true but it is. I can't hide from it anymore so now I need to get out there and see what it's all about. There are not too many secrets in our family and I wanted to tell you because I will be going out more and meeting new people. I can't lie to you about where I am going and who I am with. I have to tell you now because you are my family and you are the people I am closest to and I need you to be there."
I haven't had a proper relationship for ten years... in the last two months I have been losing my hair more than normal and then my Dr sent me to a shrink... which I believed I didn't need to see but it worked out well. Mum and Dad could see what it was starting to do to me and I needed to come clean. They haven't treated me any differently. I was scared my Mum would cry every day for the rest of her life and my Dad would say penance for me every day for the rest of his life but they and my brothers are good... and I'm grateful for that. See what happens when I introduce them to a gurl!
So now I just need to get out there... suggestions???

That is beautiful! Hope things go well for you.

Ruby, it gets harder to meet people as you get older. Most events are for those under about 35.Or else it's clubs. So get out there while you can still mix with that age group.

The best way is just be honest, be who you are. People will either accept you or not, the ones who do deserve you the ones who dont arnt worth thinking about.

My way of coming out was simple, one day not that long ago actually I just decided it felt right and just said to everyone I spoke to that day. "Im Gay' most people thought I was kidding because I can be a pretty sarcastic person. But when they realised I was serious no one was really surprised and no one really minded. This day and age, you can be openly gay. Take advantage, be who you are, love who you want, do what you do

For most of my friends, I knew it wouldn't be a problem, there were a couple (and still are a few) who I was unsure how they'd take it.

For example, a few years ago where I worked, I used to pretend/act like I was gay (back when I had no clue I actually was) because one of my friends who I worked with, thought it was funny (don't ask me why)….but then this year I started working with that friend again and I was so nervous to tell her because of how I acted a few years ago and felt awful for it because I thought she would have felt I was lying to her back then. (and also for pretending to be something that I wasn't - at the time)

We were going through my employment papers and I came across the harassment clause and I said to her I'll only work with you if the people here follow the 5th one down (which was about sexuality) and she asked what the 5th one down was so I gave her the sheet and she started laughing (which I assumed she would) because she thought I was joking until she looked up and saw my face. I thought it was funny because she went from being in hysterics to a quiet 'oh, ohhhh' followed by a 'oh okay cool man'

She asked a few standard questions but was totally cool with it. I was soooo relieved! We worked together and laughed like old times for a couple of months before she moved to canada Miss her face because she's one person who can cheer me up in an instant

The difficult thing with 'my generation' is that when you say "I'm gay", they think you're joking or just putting yourself down because it's now apparently a synonym for being lame or uncool.
e.g.: "Your t-shirt is so gay".
e.g.: (friend hacks Facebook) ... What's on your mind: "I'm gay"
^ happens all.the.time.

So to clear all doubt, I've decided to say that I'm a 'raging homosexual'.

Quote:

Originally Posted by soniktoothpenny

The difficult thing with 'my generation' is that when you say "I'm gay", they think you're joking or just putting yourself down because it's now apparently a synonym for being lame or uncool.
e.g.: "Your t-shirt is so gay".
e.g.: (friend hacks Facebook) ... What's on your mind: "I'm gay"
^ happens all.the.time.

So to clear all doubt, I've decided to say that I'm a 'raging homosexual'.

Hahahahaha

But in all seriousness, I get so annoyed when people use the word 'gay' in that context. It already means happy and homosexual, how on earth can it mean something bad? And it's way too confusing when one word can mean so many things!

Quote:

Originally Posted by megawatts

Hahahahaha

But in all seriousness, I get so annoyed when people use the word 'gay' in that context. It already means happy and homosexual, how on earth can it mean something bad? And it's way too confusing when one word can mean so many things!

I second that. I get so frustrated when I hear that because I think the language we use has a significant impact on the way society perceives individuals and groups.
I particularly get upset when I hear people use terms like 'faggot' and 'retarded' because there's so much history and negativity attached ...

I think teachers have some kind of responsibility to tell students off for it, instead of dismissing it or actually using it themselves ...
#teacherstryingtobecool ... not on, ever!

Quote:

Originally Posted by soniktoothpenny

I second that. I get so frustrated when I hear that because I think the language we use has a significant impact on the way society perceives individuals and groups.
I particularly get upset when I hear people use terms like 'faggot' and 'retarded' because there's so much history and negativity attached ...

I think teachers have some kind of responsibility to tell students off for it, instead of dismissing it or actually using it themselves ...
#teacherstryingtobecool ... not on, ever!

I wish teachers would too. I feel so guilty and shameful every time I don't tell someone off for using those words in bad contexts.

And yeah, language definitely impacts on society's perceptions. Smart arse

Quote:

Originally Posted by soniktoothpenny

I second that. I get so frustrated when I hear that because I think the language we use has a significant impact on the way society perceives individuals and groups.
I particularly get upset when I hear people use terms like 'faggot' and 'retarded' because there's so much history and negativity attached ...

I think teachers have some kind of responsibility to tell students off for it, instead of dismissing it or actually using it themselves ...
#teacherstryingtobecool ... not on, ever!

I'm a teacher and that (as well as any form of discrimination) is the one thing I will absolutely never let slide if I hear it in the classroom. It's ridiculous how often that kind of language is thrown around amongst young people though. It's frustrating that some teachers will turn a blind eye to language like that but tell a student off for not having their shirt tucked in...

I'm probably kind of lucky in the sense that I literally just sat down with my mother and sister and said, "I have no interest in guys. I like girls." And they're like, "Okay, and?" As if it wasn't a big deal to them at all. They didn't tease me about it either, except my mother joking about going lesso for Charlize Theron. Hah.

That said, I never make it known to friends or potential friends my sexuality. I'm kind of quiet really, and so it never comes up. However, when I imagine telling people in the future who I get close to, I do kind of freeze up. I suppose the way I 'come out' will depend on the individual to whom I am coming out to. In the end though, if they don't accept it, then there's really little I can do but console myself in the belief that they really didn't care about me enough in the first place.

I really just trust my intuition on these things.