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Doing Depression Alone

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20mg per day?
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yup.
if i dont take it, it isnt pretty.
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Quote:

Originally Posted by datkindagal View Post

Discuss


How do single people deal and cope with depression.

I also suffer from depression. Mine is reactive - stimulus being getting involved with other gay men. Makes life challenging

Everyone is different when dealing with depression. Try to find what works for you. Avoid self harm behaviours if you can (including drugs/alcohol). they are only a short term solution - the underlying causes will still be there and surface over and over.

Some of the flippant remarks to your post sickens me. Ignore them, for they are ignorant. They wouldn't say those things if they had depression.

Trust me, when depressed, you're better off single. The challenges of a relationship make it worse. Anything a partner would do would always be the wrong thing anyway.

I suggest sourcing a book called 'Climbing out of depression' by sue Atkinson. Written by another depression sufferer. Very easy to read, and broken down into manageable, bite sized pieces.

For me, I find 'going within' and reading spiritual books helps. But we are all different.

There are times when the pain of depression is so unbearable that thoughts of 'ending it' come into being.

As sick as this sounds, when that happens to me, I research suicide methods on the net and look at the grisly pics. I also write sucide notes to people (that i never send). Helps to snap me out of it.

You could also try keeping a journal/ diary just for yourself - great way to express what you're feeling. The only person who can get you out of it is you. You'd be amazed at the strength you have when you go deep within. Medical help is only a small part of the journey. The rest is up to you. And somewhere inside you is the power to face life as a depression sufferer.

Hope this helps in some way. It may not feel like it when your depressed, but you are connected to the world, and play an important part in it. Whatever you do or say, leaves an imprint. Thus you have the amazing ability to spread joy and happiness. And that is a rare gift indeed.

And be assured that you have an amazing, sensitive soul that can' see' others, and to help them. When you help others, you also help yourself.

If you ever want to chat anytime. Feel free to PM me.

Take care of yourself.
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It would be great if there was some sort of physical 'space' for us to attend and support each other. Difficult to set up and manage, butit would have to be a non threatening environment where participation is voluntary ( just to sit there with others who are dperessed could help).

We could hug each other - the power of physical touch (an asexual hug) can be amazing. As a nurse, i know that sometimes a simple asexual touch Or hug can do much more than any drug.

Anyway, I don't think powers that be in the 'community' care enough to do this.

They can't make money out of it .

But if anyone reading this does, and cares enough, please help us.

Quote:

Originally Posted by jonteevee View Post

I would try to be around people I like/care for as much as I could.

A lot of the time when a person is depressed they do not find enjoyment in activities they usually enjoy because they spend a lot of their time ruminating on negative thoughts. Distraction is a great way to remove the focus on negative thoughts. Ask a friend if they can catch up with you on a regular basis.

Going out and volunteering seems to helps me. And if the people I am helping are from a disadvantaged group, it sometimes gives me perspective on my own situation and helps me to be thankful for what I do have.

After a while, I would try to look at the way I am thinking and challenge it in some way. This is always the hard part because if you are in a depressed mood you just tend to focus on the negative and it just snowballs. Having other people tell you how awesome you are helps a lot lol and makes it easier to shift focus towards slightly more positive thinking.

When I am feeling depressed, I always read this kinda stuff and it never seems to help at the time I read it. Its like my mind and emotions are separate and are having a crazy pokemon battle in my head lol. I know what I should be doing but my emotions seem to be kicking my minds ass.

Pulling yourself out of depression is not easy at all but having others around definitely helps. I imagine doing depression alone would be emotionally exhausting.

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And send people in pain straight to the gap.

Good one mate

Quote:

Originally Posted by Light-Bearer View Post

I drink heavily and take alot of drugs.

Trusting this helps

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No offence to you, I know you mean well. But if it was that easy, there would be no need for meds or therapy.

Depression is a complete disconnection from everyone and everything.

Doesn't matter what people say or do, it doesn't help.

Best thing you can do if a friend is suffering depression is to just let then talk. No clinches or words or wisdom. Just listen , and give them a big hug to show you care.

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheOldie View Post

Touch wood its not happened to me.

But along the lines of Jonteevee I dont dwell on something/anything that pisses me or makes me sad etc. Sure I will think of it but to stay inside brewing over it for hours is something I have never done.

I keep myself occupied all the time. If I am sitting at home and feel a sort of loneliness I go to the movies or catch up for a coffee with friends go to the beach etc
or just watching my favourite TV show or good movie gives me the happy vibes in a few seconds.

Realise its easy to say and hugs to all that suffer.

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Unfortunately, there is a big element of truth in what you say.

It's amazing the soo called friends in your life that turn away when you really need them.

But also surprising are people who do support you - often quite out of the blue.

There are positives in everything, and the positive of depression is that you gain the ability too 'see' people with greater clarity.

The guy who says e loves you when your well suddenly disappears when you go through depression. That's not love

As painful as it is, better to find that out before you buy a house together and years of your life.

Quote:

Originally Posted by VladTheImpaler View Post

But most of the time, the sad truth is nobody really gives a fuck, not even your closest friends.

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But he doesn't realize that anyone of us can be faced with the battle of depression including him.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark_ View Post

I think he was one referring to one person in particular rather than people with depression in general. And I think that's fair enough

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Quote:

Originally Posted by faeriegoddess View Post

immaturity is no excuse. he's not a child.

I'm agreeing with LB. It does pass and it does get better.

Not for everyone. People do commit suicide
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People with depression do tend to push people away

I know I have. Seems easier being alobe sometimes Because a lot of people are so egocentric and just don't care anyway.

Quote:

Originally Posted by greggles View Post

its all well and good about how comfortable everyone should feel at a same same meet, but for a person with depression, or anxiety, or any one of a myriad of other things that can affect how they interact with each other, those words are pretty much useless. I was all set to rock up tomorrow, but I've taken a slide backward again and my initial reaction is....throw in everything like my involvement in this site and the movie night I wanted to have because who gives a shit...I never said it was rational....I said its how I feel but I'm resisting that temptation at this stage...thanksfully few people know how it feels to sit alone in your home for an entire weekend and not have a single call or SMS or invite to anything like going out etc....that's my life week in week out no wonder I feel worthless lol....sigh

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Quote:

Originally Posted by Light-Bearer View Post

And that's my point exactly.

And then I don't even give a fuck.

So what chance is there.

Also- I'm sure it drives everyone crazy when I'm depressed and they have to hear my bullshit. Thats why I try not to talk about it. And even if I did decide to talk about it.
Most of the time. I don't know why I'm feeling this particular thing or how to even begin to stop it. Because it's not like it's some surface thing that you can just shake or scratch off and then move on.

It's this weird sadness that's right in the centre of you. And it's always there. Sometimes it's not so pronounced. Other times. It moves in for a few months and takes the house over.

I hate my depression. I would give anything to erase it from myself and be a "normal" and "happy" person. But for whatever purpose. I have it.

The most frustrating thing to me. Is when people tell me to cheer up.
You hear this alot when you are depressed. And I get it. It must be fucking annoying listening to us. But the truth of the matter is. I want to cheer up. Believe me I do. And if I could.
I would.
But in reality. I can't. I can't even do it when I want to do it. So what hope in hell do I have, in cheering up, just because somebody else wants me to do it.

So I stare in space alot and remove myself from people. This way I don't annoy anyone with my moodiness.

It would be hard for some to care about your depression when you do so many drugs.
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You dont have to fight depression, on ur own. I have been fighting depression for the last 2 and a half years, but i asked for help. I rang beyondblue and i also went to my doctor, local gp. The gp put me on tablets, pristiq, i started off on 50mg, but im now on 100mg, i still get days when im depressed, but im also seeing a psychologist as well, but under the federal government, u only get so many visits that are paid by medicare, i have to pay $25 above the prescribed amount, but it is better than having to pay $125. So there are people out there to help you, but you have to find it, but the best place to start is ur local gp. I hope this helps.
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I have suffered from depression for so long, but I try not to let it affect my life too much. My symptoms are mainly lack of interest/concentration and being emotionless. I have tried going to see a psychologist, but the fact that they charge so much really puts me off from seeing one (not that I don't have money, but I really don't feel like spending $150 a week to see a psychologist especially since anyone these days can be a psychologist...)

I have also tried several medications and the only one that worked so far is lexapro (it helped me to get rid of my anxiety completely but not the depression)

I am not currently on any medication
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Quote:

Originally Posted by moose6969 View Post

You dont have to fight depression, on ur own. I have been fighting depression for the last 2 and a half years, but i asked for help. I rang beyondblue and i also went to my doctor, local gp. The gp put me on tablets, pristiq, i started off on 50mg, but im now on 100mg, i still get days when im depressed, but im also seeing a psychologist as well, but under the federal government, u only get so many visits that are paid by medicare, i have to pay $25 above the prescribed amount, but it is better than having to pay $125. So there are people out there to help you, but you have to find it, but the best place to start is ur local gp. I hope this helps.

I have to agree that your GP is a great place to start. Find one you like and trust and chat to them. If they are genuine about helping you, like anyone genuine, they will help you take the steps needed to start the road to recovery.

To be honest people who have never suffered from anxiety and depression can be extremely unhelpful to a sufferer. If the person you are talking to about your battle is a good friend, someone who simply understands that "something is wrong" and wants to see you get better then oft times that is all you can hope for and expect. This is not a broken arm or lung cancer. Non-sufferers have a very hard time comprehending why those who do or have suffered simply can't "snap out of it" or change their behaviour to change their mood or something to that effect.

Personally I have always intellectually understood depression and anxiety but not having previously experienced either before 2011 I didn't realise how debilitating it could be and frankly I've had a relatively mild battle with it.

My advice, for what it's worth, is simply to keep talking to those professionals designed to help you and keep trying what they suggest. It's not sprint - it's a marathon and some days you'll lose hard and making it from 1pm to 2pm seems like 50 years but other days can be enjoyable, and in my case, like they used to be.

Something that has helped me through all this when I felt like nearly all was lost was to remember a quote that is from the Bible but which I first heard on The West Wing and have come to enjoy: "weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning." (not religious - just enjoy a good turn of phrase and seemed very apt for me)

I am proof that depression and anxiety strikes anyone at any time. Mine really started to affect my life in around Aug/Sept of 2011 in a year which everything was in my favour. In the middle of the year I'd celebrated losing 50kg over the last 3 and a bit years, I'd come out in 2009 and was growing more confident and comfortable with who I was, I'd just had surgery to remove vericose veins which had troubled me since I was 10 years old, I had a great group of friends and really enjoyed my work... Anyone from the outside looking in would honestly wonder why I was crashing and burning and I wondered that myself. But eventually, with a great deal of strength, courage and advice I was able to take the steps to start recovery. And it took months and it's some of the hardest stuff I've had to face but I've kept faith in the treatments, in my GP, psychologist, friends and family and with all that help and support I can honestly say it does get better.

Just don't give up - the quote I gave before eventually came true for me! Hopefully it will tomorrow too
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hi there and thank you for your reply to my message i was very appreciative of it . its very hard living with depression i know you just have to take the good with the bad i suppose i'm not really sure anyway thanksagain for your reply ,
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Does anyone know what is the waiting period on seeing a psychiatrist in a hospital if I get a referral from my doctor?
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I don't need this shit but message me if you need to discuss anything.
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Quote:

Originally Posted by friendlyguy View Post

Does anyone know what is the waiting period on seeing a psychiatrist in a hospital if I get a referral from my doctor?

Go and see your GP and get a referral. I have no waitings? Why got to A hospital? Are you in a isolated area?
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Quote:

Originally Posted by badamj2000 View Post

Go and see your GP and get a referral. I have no waitings? Why got to A hospital? Are you in a isolated area?

If you get a referral to a hospital I guess it would be covered by Medicare. I don't really have $150 a week for private psychologists and that government scheme that they have in place doesn't really help much
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Don't waste your time with a psychologist. See a doctor.
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Quote:

Originally Posted by Lazzarus View Post

Don't waste your time with a psychologist. See a doctor.

Was your experience with psychologists negative as well? It seems just expensive chit chat to me, of course occasionally you come across some really good ones who know what they are doing

How did doctor help you? did he give you medication?
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Quote:

Originally Posted by friendlyguy View Post

If you get a referral to a hospital I guess it would be covered by Medicare. I don't really have $150 a week for private psychologists and that government scheme that they have in place doesn't really help much

It cost me nothing to see a shrink - all covered by medicare/healthcare. Again ask your GP s/he should have all the answers. Dont ask Lazz as he is perfectly mental.
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Quote:

Originally Posted by friendlyguy View Post

Was your experience with psychologists negative as well? It seems just expensive chit chat to me, of course occasionally you come across some really good ones who know what they are doing

How did doctor help you? did he give you medication?

I can't discuss anything here but I'd be happy to talk to you privately.
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Self diagnosis is a bad idea. Speak to professionals.

They may try to prescribe some antidepressants. So what? You probably drink or take recreational/illicit drugs anyway; don't rely on them as a crutch, they're depressants! Seek proper help, get proper help and speak to your care provider about treatment plans. A doctor will be less willing to put you on medication if you ask to explore alternate routes such as regular visits to a psychologist to start with. If alternate treatment isn't working, then why not give medication a go? You're depressed and the goal is to no longer be that way, medication and therapy are a good combination to achieve that goal and still go about your life with a more positive outlook. There may be side effects, and it's up to you and your doctor to weigh the potential benefits against those before starting.
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Quote:

Originally Posted by qazwsx View Post

Self diagnosis is a bad idea. Speak to professionals.

They may try to prescribe some antidepressants. So what? You probably drink or take recreational/illicit drugs anyway; don't rely on them as a crutch, they're depressants! Seek proper help, get proper help and speak to your care provider about treatment plans. A doctor will be less willing to put you on medication if you ask to explore alternate routes such as regular visits to a psychologist to start with. If alternate treatment isn't working, then why not give medication a go? You're depressed and the goal is to no longer be that way, medication and therapy are a good combination to achieve that goal and still go about your life with a more positive outlook. There may be side effects, and it's up to you and your doctor to weigh the potential benefits against those before starting.

I agree : see a professional
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Sex and drugs.
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sex is all well and good if you can get it. Drugs + bells is bad bad medicine!
Talking about being bad, have recently stopped my meds. Seem to be doing....reasonably considering. Tearier, more hyped up, but have lost weight and feel more creative. But am more prone to getting pissed off with everyone. No SI incidents yet either which is good.

It is a long road people, and any of you just starting to get well, be prepared. I wish I had gotten help earlier, I wish I'd listened to those who told me I needed help. I don't think I'll ever be "normal" but I have learned how to know and manage my own emotions and brain. To see the warning signs and do something about them before everything blows up. It doesn't always work, and right now I am in a pretty shite place, but I can look back on previous crap times and honestly say that I am dealing with the depression in better and better ways.
One thing I am going to have to tell you is don't expect a quick fix, or that the first treatment you get is going to work. And find a good doctor. They do exist. If you don't like the one you have, hell, don't be afraid to find a new one.
If there's one thing you can't lose, it's that feel.
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I use to be on 150mg of zoloft every day but had no emotions like spock but got off them and 5yrs later Im free and happy I love me so very much life does get better but you need to want it to and it takes time.
Bite my sexy mental ass!
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I think regular physical exercise - getting your heart rate up high for 30mins a day, or every other day, is an excellent cure-all. But why don't I do that? I may be too lazy or disorganised or sub consciously self-sabotage myself. People are so complex and fraught?

I may a have a close cousin, that may look just like me, that may, or may not , be on like 20mg of generic Prozac a day. Please don't tell anyone as I understand such things are highly stigmatized...
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Last edited by badamj2000: 14th May 2012 at 08:48 AM

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shit sorry I was a bit hyper in my last post. I worry about the fact I went off my meds. But....I hate the meds.
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