hi guys sorry I,ve not posted for a while just bought a new computer so here goes. I,ve been good friends with a young guy for about two years. he,s now 16 and he told me that he has fallen in love with me. He knows that I,m a lot older than him but it deosn,t worry him. Just the other day he told me he wants a sexual relationship with me. he knows that I,ve lost a testicle but he doesn,t care about it. he loves me for the way i am and he,s very keen on the sex side of things. I,ve talked about it with him and he is 100% sure that it,s what he wants. I do love him very much but am scared that if I follow through I may get burnt. would like some advice please!!!

well life and love is always a gamble

yes it is possible you will get burnt
but then again you might not either

at the end of the day it is a choice as to whether you are prepared to take the chance

but the age difference may be a much bigger challenge than either of you realise
both internally between you and externally - others
not to mention the law

i would very seriously consider your choices here
could cause much more drama than you would ever expect

Oh the memories. My first bf was 16. I was 18 at the time. I think when you're 16 it's much easier to fall in love, and I think it's sweet that this guy wants to be with you. The age of consent in this state is an outdated law as far as I'm concerned, but it did worry me when I was with my guy. I mean, what 16 year old guy wants to wait 2 years until he can have sex?
Best of luck to you, and put yourself in his shoes. If you like him as much as he likes you, then just talk about it and see where things go.

I can only speak for myself ... but I am nearly 38 and if a 16yo was wanting a relationship with me there would be no way I would go there. I would feel a responsibility to care for this boy and be a friend instead. I would choose to try and guide him through this process, as a mentor.

When I was 26, a boy who said he was 16 professed his undying love for me. I diffused the situation immediately. Later I found out he was actually 14.

I fear a whole world of trouble for both of you if you offer your heart to someone who is still in High School.

Again I stress this is just my personal opinion... and I don't know either of you, so I don't presume to advise or instruct you. Hope this helps in some way.

You're asking our permission/advice on whether you should rape someone? Maximum 14 years prison? Or maybe you're not talking about anal sex. Consent cannot be given by a minor so grow up and accept some responsibility as an adult!

You know it's wrong, otherwise you wouldn't question it. Come on!

Is it a relationship you're after? What could you possibly have in common with him? Endearing as naivete is, it disappears quickly and is not a basis for anything long-term.

I think you should tell him firmly and unequivocally no and then look at whether you did anything to invite his advances.

to meezono4 thanks, yes we,ve talked a lot about this situation and he is aware of what might happen. he has been to the police to find out what could happen to each of us and they have informed him that as he is 16, he is legally able to have a sexual relationship with anyone else over 16. as far as they as concerned, as long as there is no rape or abuse involved, they can see no reason to take any action. by the way he is definetely 16 as he turns 17 in four weeks time.

Quote:

Originally Posted by onenut1000

to meezono4 thanks, yes we,ve talked a lot about this situation and he is aware of what might happen. he has been to the police to find out what could happen to each of us and they have informed him that as he is 16, he is legally able to have a sexual relationship with anyone else over 16. as far as they as concerned, as long as there is no rape or abuse involved, they can see no reason to take any action. by the way he is definetely 16 as he turns 17 in four weeks time.

You need to be aware that in Queensland it's a criminal offence for one male to have anal intercourse with another male if one partner is under the age of 18.

No such prohibition applies to heterosexuls.

I would'nt take the risk myself.

mudley "I can only speak for myself ... but I am nearly 38 and if a 16yo was wanting a relationship with me there would be no way I would go there. I would feel a responsibility to care for this boy and be a friend instead. I would choose to try and guide him through this process, as a mentor."


Totally agree....be there as a friend/mentor...and if that cannot work, walk away

I dated a guy when he was 21yo and I was 39.... Big mistake....for two years.....

We were at totally different stages of developmental growth...it wasnt fair on both of us.....

I know that now, but at the time it felt right....it wasnt, I couldnt see.....

Sean

Don't 16yo gay boys still chase red balls across the street?

I know 20yos have been known to....

From personal experience, I can tell you 16 year old boys are idiots. I wasn't 16 that long ago and I fully admit that in a few short years I have grown soo much. I really was an idiot then. The late teens-early twenties years of a young man's life are pivotal for development and boy can things change quickly.

My advice to you mimicks those above, at most be a mentor to this boy. I can' t help but shake the feeling that despite his consent, a 44 year old man being with a 16 year old boy is taking advantage of him. Despite how mature he may seem, he isn't. At all. I'm only 20 and I wouldn't date a 16 year old.

Despite all this as well, from a legal stand point you would be in a whole world of trouble if anyone notified the police of your relationship. It just doesn't sound worth it.

hi everyone, just to let you all know that after placing this post, my young friend and myself have ended our friendship. after being great friends for two years. he has to move to cairns to look after his grandpa. I too will be saying goodbye.

sounds like a very smart move.. ! good luck