Due to the opportunistic and monotonous attacks on our bear community that are occurring on this site, Mama would like to offer up some facts about the bear community to help educate folks about the real Bear Community

Little bit of history
Originating in the 80's, the bear community began with guys who felt that mainstream gay culture was unwelcoming to men who did not fit a particular bodily norm (thin, hairless, gym toned and young). These guys began by forming small groups. The first bear bar (Lone Star Saloon) opened in 1989 in the leather district San Francisco. Unlike other bars in the area the patrons of this bar weren’t into fashion leather, just biker leathers and was the unofficial home of the Rainbow Motorcycle Club. At this stage, size had nothing to do with being a bear – the guys weren’t gym junkies nor were they overweight. They were just regular guys with the common denominator being facial hair and a friendly masculine attitude. In the early 90’s the members of “Girth & Mirth (a n organization for large gay men) began to merge into the bear community as did groups of very muscular men. As it stands today, the bear community is made up of and welcomes men of all shapes and sizes – thin, fat, muscular, and your average Joe.

Now to address some of the myths circulating these boards about the bear community

All bears are fat, hairy men with beards who just want to have sex with other fat hairy men with beards
Wrong. As stated earlier the bear community is made up of and welcomes folks not only all shapes and sizes, but also all different ages, sexualities and physical/sexual/romantic attractions. These include

1. Bears - Hairy men with a stocky or heavyset build, usually with facial hair.
2. Chubs - Heavy set gay men who don’t necessarily self- identify as bears. Can be hairy or hairless, and with or without facial hair
3. Otters - Men who are hairy, but not large or stocky. Typically thinner, swimmer's build, or with lean muscle. Can be with or without facial hair
4. Muscle bears - Muscular versions of bears. Can be hairy or hairless, and with or without facial hair
5. Wolves - Lean, masculine gay men attracted to bears and involved in the bear scene. Can be hairy or hairless , and with or without facial hair.
6. Trappers - Men of smaller stature attracted to bears. Can be hairy or hairless , age and with or without facial hair.
7. Cubs - Younger (or younger looking) versions of a bear,
8. Polar bears – Older bears with silver or white hair.
9. Admirers – Men who are sexually or romantically attracted to bears
10. Chasers - Men who are attracted to overweight men.
11. Daddy bears - Older bears, looking for a daddy/son relationship with younger men.
12. Grizzly Adams - Men who are hairy and attracted to bears; but do not self-identify as a bear.
13. Gummy Bears - Bears who date or are exclusively attracted to other bears. As in, ‘They stick together like gummy bears.’
14. Leatherbears - Bears with a leather fetish.
15. Goldilocks - Females, often heterosexual, who are often in the company of bears (a bear's fag hag).
16. Gobi Bear - Heterosexual males who are bear friendly.

This diversity is highlighted in a quote from SF Brawny Bear of The Complete Bear website who states

“Very often we are asked, “What is a bear?” The danger here is whatever we define, somehow excludes those that don’t match that description – which never was the intent. The strongest attribute of the bear community is inclusion - freedom to be who you are, to look how you look, and acceptance from your bear brothers.”

The Bear Community is exclusive.
It can be, but not as much as is being made out here. The whole bear thing was originally based around the physical power of the grizzly bear and the homoerotic masculine image of the Canadian lumberjack. This appreciation of power and masculinity still runs through the veins of the Bear Community and because of this, effeminate, flamboyant men may not be made welcome within the bear community or at bear events. Apart from that Mama knows no reason why you would be not welcomed by the Bears if you had a legitimate reason for wanting to be there.

Bears are a drain on our health system
This is by far the most ignorant argument against bears raised so far as it is based on the very incorrect assumption that all bears are overweight - which for the umpteenth time I will state is untrue. Not all bears are overweight so how are bears as a group a drain on our health system. Yes there is a proportion of the bear community who are overweight and they may use our health system more that others but that is because they are overweight – not because they are bears.

On a side note here, Mama despises this idea of overweight folks being a drain on our health system as it brings up the vile notion of the deserving and undeserving ill. For those of you who advocate denying healthcare or penalizing folks whose illness is through lifestyle choices, you may want to consider the consequences of what you’re asking for. If you want a system where you can say to people that “Your diabetes was caused by your own actions so why should I have to pay for it”, then the next step will be folks saying “I know your Cystic fibrosis wasn’t caused by your own doing but it certainly wasn’t caused by my doing either so why should I pay for it”

The Bear Community is unwelcoming and Unfriendly
Mama is not going to waste time disputing other posters anecdotes of being made unwelcome by bears – that’s their reality and they are entitled to it. She will however relate to you a story where she saw firsthand how welcoming the bears can be.
When all this bear bashing began a few weeks ago Mama decided to try a little experiment and went o the “Den Night” of Vicbears Melb. Now Den Night is the monthly meeting of the VicBears social group and as you would expect was full of some of the major players within Melbs bear scene. Mama was incognito on the night in boy drag with a full beard and no girdle so she blended in fine. The two people who accompanied her however stood out like dogs balls. Joe (Mamas hubby) 6ft tall, 27 but looks 20, face that couldn’t grow a beard if he wanted to and weighing around 65 kg dripping wet. Steven, well dressed, no beard, thick styled hair, one of Melbs premier show girls most nights average height and weight. Well within minutes of sitting down one of the Vicbears came over, welcomed us saying it was nice to see some new faces in the place, and began chatting. Later on, another guy came giving away raffle tickets and the way he decided how many you got was to measure your inner leg – both Joe and Steven were included in this bit of fun. To cut this tale short - .the night was fun and at no time were any of us made to feel unwelcome.

Mama is not going to say that all bears are friendly and welcoming souls because just like in any other group there are going to be dickheads. The thing is they are not dickheads because they are bears, they were just dickheads to begin with. Every group has its bad seeds and to judge an entire group on the actions of a few members is ridiculous.

Bears think that any gay male who fits the stereotypical description of a bear, should also identify as a bear.
This is not true. Firstly, bears for the most part only socialize at bear bars/events with other guys who identify as bears. They don’t go out to mainstream gay venues and therefore don’t have the opportunity force the bear ideology on anyone even if they wanted too. Secondly, if a guy who happens to look like a bear visits a bear bar, then isn’t it understandable that the bears inside may think he identifies as a bear? Lastly, you put a guy with a facial hair or a belly in a mainstream gay club and Mama would put money on a lot of folks thinking they were bears. Its just what gayers do. Just the same as thy label any guy that chooses to go out in female clothing as a drag queen.

Finally
Bears are not to be feared or hated. It might not be your scene and that is fine but don’t hate them just because of that. They do a lot of work for charities and have a sense of community that the mainstream gay community lost years ago. There's enough hate and negativity towards our gay community from outsiders without us turning on each other for no real reason

For the record Mama does have the stereotypical physical appearance of a bear but, does not now nor has she ever identified as a bear. She does however enjoy their company on occasion and has many friends who are fully amerced within the bear community

She will leave you now with the trailer to Bear City, which shows gives a pretty good indication of all the shapes and sizes that frequent the bear world - and yes there is big overweight men featured so just get over it. No ones asking you too bed them - just accept them

Same Same Media Player

Bear City - Trailer - YouTube

Bless Mama, great post my darling xx

Yeah but Mama Bear has a certain ring to it don't ya think? Who's been eating my porridge?.....

What about people (me) who say that bear communities are even more sexist and exclusive than the rest of the gay male community (wow I know), in that they do not like to socialise with women and as such bear clubs and venues always exclude women - even butch women that could, by comparison, be the dyke version of a bear.

Onya Mama. Am sick of all the queer on queer bashing. Some self love and inclusiveness would be nice.

Quote:

Originally Posted by VladTheImpaler

What about people (me) who say that bear communities are even more sexist and exclusive than the rest of the gay male community (wow I know), in that they do not like to socialise with women and as such bear clubs and venues always exclude women - even butch women that could, by comparison, be the dyke version of a bear.

Hey Vlad. Mama agrees with what you are saying in that bears very rarely socialie with women and could be considered sexist and exclusive. Now Mama cant speak for all the bears out there but she can state that the ones she knows definitely don't hate women - they have women friends, housemates etc and will engage in social activities with them quite happily. Its only really when they hit the venues that they seem to want to exclude women and this is just a guess, but Mama thinks it may be one of or a mixture of a few things
1. Its just a bloke thing and just like straight guys who like to go out with the boys and be all blokey and stuff
2. When bears get together its quite a sexual environment which they seem to enjoy and including gals would obviously effect this.
3. They value their community the way it is and fear that if they allow gals into there community, they will in turn bring others into the community and before you know it the bear community will have died - just like same way as the mainstream gay community has.

Concerning excluding women from venues, Mama can only speak for venues in Melbourne and Sydney but she knows that of the three venues frequented by bears in Melbourne - The Laird is Men Only, Sircuit is men only on Friday and Saturday but mixed on Thursday and Sunday and DT's is mixed every night. In Sydney she only knows of The Oxford which as far as Mama knows is mixed always.

I agree that the somewhat exclusionary nature of the bear community is problematic, however I also think it is overstated and not necessarily always the case in practice - for example bear bar 'Urge' in Auckland does not bar women (or drag queens) and if a group of woman came to the bear community with a proposal to integrate in some way at a certain event I'm sure an accommodation could be made.

I think there is another issue with queer woman (I know it's a bit condescending for me to say this, but ...) - they don't go out! At least not to the extent that men do.
They couple up and stay at home, women's events and clubs/spaces in Auckland are never well patronized and tend to fold after a few months.

You can't argue with success, and the bear community is really leading the way in terms of putting on events that are well patronized.

I tried to get into Urge once and didn't get it in. My friend also tried once and didn't get in. But then family opened so we didn't need to scrape desperately at their door anymore.

Hopefully Inquisition in Aug depending on friends work. Lots of bears there
and not once has skinny , hairless me been attacked/abused.

Only once when this cunt in green leather said to me I should try a bit harder with my outfit next time. Told her to get fucked then slashed her face. Well actually I just smiled that smarmy smile and walked off. I wasnt wearing any leather oh well.

But from Mama's list I suppose they must think of me as a Trapper hahahahahahaa

This is a good post Mama Catastrophie and even though I disagree with you on a few points and I don't believe identity groups really liberate anyone. I have to admit when I first moved to Melbourne a few bears were very welcoming to me and a good friend of mine was MrCub2002 and yes I did have a couple of negative experiences with bears, yet I just based them on being issues with the individuals involved.

My current negative perspective of bears only started when I moved back to Sydney, 7 years ago and I have to say my encounters with the Sydney Bear community has been negative, cruel, excluding, rejecting and nasty in general and that's really tainted my whole perspective on bears. Hence why I go to town on them, and I've actually had more realistic and positive experiences with other sub-groups in Sydney.

I think women are far more 'exclusive' than men. So there!

At Sircuit, last Friday, I overheard a guy talking to his friend, saying I was "too skinny". Fuck 'im. For me it's water off a ducks back, I've been called alot worse before, in horribly confronting ways. That ever-so-slightly-slightly bitchy comment aside, I had a blast. The music was still a bit shit, like most gay venues, but it wasn't too cheesy, or too zip-zap-zoop dancey either.

Quote:

Originally Posted by joejoe84

At Sircuit, last Friday, I overheard a guy talking to his friend, saying I was "too skinny". Fuck 'im. For me it's water off a ducks back, I've been called alot worse before, in horribly confronting ways. That ever-so-slightly-slightly bitchy comment aside, I had a blast. The music was still a bit shit, like most gay venues, but it wasn't too cheesy, or too zip-zap-zoop dancey either.

One can never be too skinny

very informative post & thread, lady catastrophe. i always love finding out where these things began.

i can see a similarity between how gays & bears started hanging together as they felt excluded from others, but then became a bit exclusive themselves.

i'm a bit tired of having to explain how liking bears doesn't mean i'm necessarily a chub-chaser (just as i'm tired of explaining my bisexuality, especially to gay people who should know better - but i digress...)

does anyone know of bear events that girls are welcome to attend? i see dogpound is open to bitches.

& are women really that much of an obstacle to guys scoring each other? i can understand lesbians being a bit uppity because they don't have sex on premises venues to stalk. but guys, really... why so precious?

I'd recommend people actually visit and experience things for yourself instead of following second-hand anecdotes and impressions from here.

http://www.harbourcitybears.com.au/
The Oxford on Friday evenings and the Lord Dudley on Sunday afternoons

Quote:

Originally Posted by marky markywicz

One can never be too skinny

+ 1

Thanks Mama, very informative, I for one had no idea of the bear sub culture or anything these guys did ever, so it is a nice read.

cheers

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gloomis666

Thanks Mama, very informative, I for one had no idea of the bear sub culture or anything these guys did ever, so it is a nice read.

cheers

Gloomis, you should tell us about the history of your particular sub-group

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark_

Gloomis, you should tell us about the history of your particular sub-group

It was just a term, I would rather not label folk as sub groups or movements etc etc.
I just used it and hoped noone would jump on it, yet you did.

I'm retired but I used to go for men who were similar to me. I got the impression you had an inclination for something different.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark_

I'm retired but I used to go for men who were similar to me. I got the impression you had an inclination for something different.

Actually I'm a sucker for dark hair and big brown eyes.

Ok, but I thought you wanted more than that

lol can't be too fussy

If a nice guy with big brown eyes and dark hair comes along well, I think your doing ok.
oh if you mean I am a rice queen well I have been in a relationship for a short time with a Thai guy and they are totally sensual lovers and honest and yum.
Other than that I just like darkish looks.

1
1
1

Quote:

Originally Posted by mark_

I'd recommend people actually visit and experience things for yourself instead of following second-hand anecdotes and impressions from here.

Woah... Passive aggressive much? Chill your boots, sunshine.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gloomis666

Other than that I just like darkish looks...

I have to agree Gloomis666 I have a natural preference for darkish looks, yet I feel it's more to do with the types of guys I grew up around. Yet hey I'm not complaining!

Amazing Write up Mama C,

I'd never heard the term Goldilocks before, but I love it, I also saw "Panda Bear" the other day, for Asian Bears, which made me giggle.

Now as for exclusion, me and my ex spent most of Fairday this year hanging out with the bears and didn't feel the slightest bit out of place, I'm a smooth very averagly built fairly queer looking boy, and you could call him an otter.

But we felt very welcome and had a great time.

Im just sad theres no title for a guy like me, I'm just noraml :P

But BearCity has it spot on

"Admitting you like bears is like coming out all over again"

I've been made to feel this way quite a few times when admiring sexy cubs, but thankfully I met someone else in Canberra who shares my attraction quite strongly, ontop of Regular guys too. ^_^

Quote:

Originally Posted by marky markywicz

One can never be too skinny

Oh yes they can......

Ha! I was just thinking that Grumpy!

Brilliant minds, eh?

Quote:

Originally Posted by VladTheImpaler

What about people (me) who say that bear communities are even more sexist and exclusive than the rest of the gay male community (wow I know), in that they do not like to socialise with women and as such bear clubs and venues always exclude women - even butch women that could, by comparison, be the dyke version of a bear.

This is not true in Sydney. Harbour City Bears (HCB) is an inclusive club with female members.

Women are welcome at all HCB events and at other bear events run by others like Honey.