Mama has just returned from the supermarket and was horrified to see yet another woman strolling around the store in her pajamas and this is just not appropriate as far as Mama is concerned. There must be something wrong with these women, coz if they think they are just being all cute and quirky by doing this then they are extremely disillusioned.

1. Scraping unwashed bed hair into a ratty ponytail and securing it with a cunny red scrunchie is not attractive. Apart from scrunchies being about 3 decades out of fashion, the use of the color red combined with the scraggly hair makes the back of your head look like the freshly punctured sphincter of a Greek sailor on shore leave.

2. Most of the women Mama has seen committing this hideous fashion faux pas will never see a size 18 again and therefore should be aware that he above hairstyle is doing nothing for their roundish faces. If you do not have a neck and your chin and chest are one, you do not accentuate it by scraping your hair back – it makes you look like a thumb with a face.

3. A fleece lined pink pajama top with “Hot Stuff” emblazed on the chest does not elicit feelings of arousal in Mama. It may you entice the occasional sexual liaison from your “2 wanks past being fussy” husband, but in Mama it just creates feelings of disgust that cause her to fantasize about setting fire to you.

4. The matching pajama pants to the above monstrosity also do nothing to impress Mama. Firstly, the print is diabolical – pink fleece with little red hearts scattered over it – really? Secondly, they are excessively snug around your crotch, which combined with the foul print makes you crotch look like some giant, inverted, discolored, corn ship sprinkled with chilli flakes. The back view is not much better with the snug fit, combined with the rolling motion of your arse as you walked, causing the little red hearts to sway around so dramatically that Mama was forced to stop and buy some motion sickness tablets to combat the feelings of nausea she was experiencing from watching you.

5. Plush slippers in the shape of chickens’ feet should not be worn by anyone apart from children. Apart from being horrified that they actually made these hideous things for adults, Mama was even more horrified to see this woman actually wearing them in public. In Mamas opinion she should have opted for a slipper in the shape of a pigs trotter – at least this would have completed the whole piggery ensemble in a nice literal sense. The chickens’ feet were just irrelevant to the whole look.

6. It was 10.30 in the morning. You should be up, showered and dressed you lazy bitches!!!

Mama is seeing an increasing number of these frightful pajama clad house fraus in public and quite frankly these women really need to get their shit together. Pajamas are to be worn at home in bed – not out in the street – it’s just wrong. If you see one you must stop, point and laugh. They must be stopped

Oh wow. Mama you are one of the funniest writers we have.

I promise I will take action on this topic and will shortly leave work to put proper trousers on. xx

Mama is everything ok, you seem very angry lately. I hope life is treating you well

I used to walk around in only my satin boxer shorts at Bass Hill Woollies about 10 p.m. at night packing munchies

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fahed

Mama is everything ok, you seem very angry lately. I hope life is treating you well

Everything's fine darlin' but thanks for asking. Mama just ant abide this pajamas in public - its horrid. xx

Quote:

Originally Posted by Anthony Mahera

I used to walk around in only my satin boxer shorts at Bass Hill Wollies about 10 p.m. at night packing munchies

pics ?

Time to move Mama !

but I know what you mean . When I go home to the country town I see this but in my area they generally dress nice.

Post gym I sometimes go in trackies to the shops, as it's on my way home.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Anthony Mahera

I used to walk around in only my satin boxer shorts at Bass Hill Woollies about 10 p.m. at night packing munchies

Well see that's fiiiiine. Bass Hill you say?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Anthony Mahera

I used to walk around in only my satin boxer shorts at Bass Hill Woollies about 10 p.m. at night packing munchies

Oh Anthony - say it isnt so. Satin boxers are horrid things. Mama has this theory that they were invented by closet transvestites who wanted to make a legitimate way for themselves to experience the sensation of ladies underwear while still appearing masculine

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheOldie

Time to move Mama !

but I know what you mean . When I go home to the country town I see this but in my area they generally dress nice.

Perhaps my love - the homeless people lying on the street around St Kilda seem to have more pride in their appearance than some of the heifers that trot around the suburbs

Quote:

Originally Posted by Phazz

Post gym I sometimes go in trackies to the shops, as it's on my way home.

Trackies are acceptable (especially if worn sans underwear) as although some people do choose to sleep in them, they are not primarily pajamas

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fahed

Well see that's fiiiiine. Bass Hill you say?

Yep I was the Service Supervisor front end and Night Manager (cause I was the only stupid idiot who would work till 12 pm each night).

Anyway, My besties and I would drive to Lake Gillawarna in our PJ's with a massive blanket in the back seat and get really really smashed then drive to Bass Hill Woolies and by chips and lollies when it was my day off on Mon or Tues. Summer time it was pretty hot all night so boxers just seems appropriate.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mama Catastrophe

Oh Anthony - say it isnt so. Satin boxers are horrid things. Mama has this theory that they were invented by closet transvestites who wanted to make a legitimate way for themselves to experience the sensation of ladies underwear while still appearing masculine

LOL Your prob right love

i don't mind the guys walking around in their underwear in public , I don't mind people walking in their pjs. But I wouldn't do it....... Unless I was dare too

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mama Catastrophe

Trackies are acceptable (especially if worn sans underwear)

Oh Mama, it was almost possible to take you seriously until that line. Tut tut. But to be honest I never pay much attention to what people look like. It's a little scary sometimes but I reckon I could have bumped into Anthony on one of his night-time nudie-runs and hardly noticed he was walking around in boxers.

I like dressing like dregs of society.

It's very rejuvenating

I laughed hard

Quote:

Originally Posted by Iratei

I like dressing like dregs of society.

It's very rejuvenating

With that bikini?

you're hilarious mama

Thanks for deleting THOSE posts, Matt. The posts were getting too personal.

Just go out and shoot them Mama....

This article has been pinched for our front page, with Mama's kind permission. xx

Matt when will u ever pinch me?

I didn't think you'd be so open sesame.

Quote:

Originally Posted by sesame

Matt when will u ever pinch me?

When you come to a meet. I'll pinch you too if you like. Repeatedly

Quote:

Originally Posted by Matt Akersten

I didn't think you'd be so open sesame.

Whatcha mean? I have a open bathroom if u want!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fahed

When you come to a meet. I'll pinch you too if you like. Repeatedly

pinch me pinch me pinch me pinch me pinch me pinch me pinch me pinch me pinch me pinch me pinch me pinch me pinch me pinch me pinch me pinch me pinch me pinch me pinch me pinch me pinch me

I have an open bathroom too, it's called Oxford Street. x

oh gosh i hate that street cause not only they wear pyjamas when buying at IGA's they also peeeee everywhere. and why is IGA closed? is everything on oxford closing!

Oxford St is the most expensive street in the southern hemisphere for business to rent.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Matt Akersten

I have an open bathroom too, it's called Oxford Street. x

LOL That was pretty funny.