That's true, some days when i'm feeling self defeatist I revert to the mindset like I never lost weight. But then I shake myself out of it. Just remember, love thy self.

Hmm, I hit the gym ( I consider myself muscular) I surf, play a lot of sports and all that stuff (to stay healthy of course). Although why be a cookie cutter when you can be a snow flake (the uniqueness of every one) I deliberately like to meet up with dudes who are not muscular or exercise junkies, example slim dudes. Part of gay Sydney has turned into a vanity obsessed circus, which I myself being a 'gay' bloke will never conform too. Beauty is definitely in the eye of the beholder whether they be slim, pumped up muscle guy or a chubby dude as long as that special spark comes from within. I agree with you mate :)

I love my beautiful average self, even though I have plenty of 'fat' days. I enjoy spending my free time with friends rathen then at the gym every spare moment I get.

Its body dysmorphic disorder.
When I was very young I went to gyms for many years. I was like every young teenage boy wanting to rid myself of the 9 stone weakling image and transform into a muscle hunk. I guess it was subconscious but it was all part of needing to belong, to be accepted by others. I felt if I looked a certain way then I would no longer be bullied or rejected.
I can remember the gym instructors specifically telling me I had to over eat to stretch my stomach so I would put on weight. They also got me onto those hideous weight gain powders. They encouraged me to lift weights so heavy that in the end I damaged my back doing squats.
To a certain extent it did make me feel more accepted because guys were more attracted to me and wanted to have sex with me. But it was so shallow. Nobody wanted to know anything about me, they just wanted sex. Some people might like that but there comes a point when its not enough.
I can remember at one point when I looked in the mirror I was not seeing what was there. All I saw was that I was skinny even though I wasn't. It was the opposite of anorexia. My focus was particularly on certain parts of my body that I was unhappy with. Focusing in this way removed those body parts from the context of the whole of my body. When looking at those parts as part of the whole they were perfectly in balance but because they weren't what I saw in others as attractive or what the media ordained as attractive I felt those parts were ugly. I strived for years and years to attain a certain look but it was like a carrot dangling on a stick in front of me. I was never good enough.
The next step would have been steroids but fortunately I didn't go there. I gave up on pumping iron in front of a mirror to attain a look. It was so mind numbing, I hated it. I also hated the atmosphere of gyms. So much arrogance and vanity under the one roof. Looking back its hard to believe I did it for so long. One day I just decided I was over it. These days I exercise to feel good. I do things I enjoy such as swimming, running, biking. I also do some light callisthenics. Looking good is an added bonus that comes as a result of putting in the effort but its no longer my focus. Its so much healthier both physically and mentally and I feel much happier. I don't deprive myself of anything. If I want ice cream I have it. Not for breakfast of course. I can do this because I have a fast metabolism. Now that Im a bit older Im really grateful for it because my friends all suffer from slow metabolisms and have trouble keeping the weight off but Ive just kind of balanced out now and remain at the perfect weight for my height and build.
I see so many young guys completely pumped up on steroids these days and then they go out and get on the coke and booze and pills etc. Its scary to think about the damage they are doing to their bodies. They think they are invincible at that age, little do they realise the consequences they shall reap later.

If your blood pressure is stable, you feel healthy and you're within a reasonable weight range - you're not 'fat'.
Corpulent. Rotund. Gordo, if you're Spanish. Portly. Chubby. 'Fat' is necessary to keep you warm, to protect your rib cage and good for protecting muscle tissue. There are good fats and bad fats. Omega fatty acids from fish and saturated fats. Heavy boned. Overweight. Obsese. The body mass index has been debunked. Some people have 'better' metabolisms than others. Genetics. Diet. Lifestyle.
'When you know better, you do better' is a good Oprah-ism. If you feel comfortable 'in your own skin' then that's enough. Stroke, diabetes, heart attacks arise from obesity.
Let's look where obesity comes from.
(a) being 'time poor' in a rushed society - it's called 'fast food' for a reason.
(b) feeling bored - too little to do - what to do? EAT!
(c) smoking cessation - when you stop smoking you tend to eat more
(d) genetic component - generational
(e) lack of exercise due to pain - arthritis, aged and infirm, etc
(f) compulsion - brain chemicals not telling you you've just eaten and are full

And the main one, Laziness.

i got wrong to click other info on the website,so lost my thing sadly.in short, all the thing i have experienced as the description of Schmoodle bascially,but what a difference is being vegetarian for a year,qutie happy til now,BTW my metabolism's faster than others too....which means no worries to the undigested food(no meats) storing in my stomach.besides don't hit gym any more to keep those muscles cuz don't need that,instead of seeking my personal measure getting healthy life.

I wish I could get fat... lol. I cannot put on weight at all.

Quote:

Originally Posted by sati54

I wish I could get fat... lol. I cannot put on weight at all.

#jealous

Quote:

Originally Posted by sati54

I wish I could get fat... lol. I cannot put on weight at all.

*facepalm*
Do you really wish you could get fat....? Really?

It's ignorant sayings like that, that spur this kind of shit on!
Why instead of saying "I wish I could get fat" don't you just say, I wish I could 'bulk' up a bit, or 'put some weight on'

Weight, body mass, chubbiness or fat,
Love your size; should be no surprise,
Self esteem is where it's at!

My doctor told me that I was fat - 15kgs overweight for my height. But according to his calculations front row footballers are also fat because they weight too much!

I don't believe in the weight to height to BMI ratio.... That's all bull shit really.
None of that really takes into account bone density, muscle density etc.
Being physically fit cannot be determined by numbers and calculations, it has to be based on how you feel and what you can tolerate.

I think most people have a pretty good idea if they are fit or not.

Hmph, skinny people whinging they are fat...

People joke that I'm fat. I'm actually a bit underweight. These days it's just a cute non-insult. Still, saying it to someone who's self-conscious is... Not wise.

Quote:

Shannon has noticed lately just how much he and his friends call each other ‘fat’. It’s all in good fun – just another way that they rib, insult and pick on each other. But could it be indicative of a self-defeating mindset?

Quote:

Most people will blame the media, and others will blame a community obsessed with youth and beauty. But these are just symptoms of a much larger issue. Get yourself a dose of reality and understand that your body issues are the result of billions upon billions of advertising dollars all poured into the media to make you feel shitty about yourself so that you will go out and fill that void with food and ‘stuff’.

Let's start with Shannon's first paragraph....

... he and his friends calling each other 'fat'.

What a 'laugh' he probably had from these words.


From his link/blog - I'm wondering if really he has any 'fat' friends, or that the word 'fat' can be used for some other sort of derogatory term. Let's replace the 'fat' word with 'gay' and get more of a laugh. So - where's the fat on here ? - http://aussiespacetimetraveller.blog...hed-naked.html


I wonder why I or anyone else should be listening/reading anything about being 'fat' from someone whom clearly isnt. More so from someone's website that is obsessed with 'perfect guys' !! (a side note was a comment on his blog - "If bodies aren't that important, why is it all the guys pictured in this blog are buff? "

Maybe Shannon should 'chat' a little bit more with 'fat' people and actually find out a little more before an article on the topic. /rant over.



Me - I'm fat, stocky, large etc etc etc. Been like that most of my life. You wont find many photos of me during those years - and there's good reasons why. Though for the past decade or so I've been active at the gym, more so in the past several years with more guidance, attempting to drop those dreaded kilos. I say 'dreaded' because it's all about perceptions in this community of ours. 'Oh - you're a bear?!". Ah... no. Look at profile site, gaydar, manhunt, and read the profiles only to know that our community is self obsessed with each other's looks (and stats). This will never change - so there's no point arguing that point.


It's too easy for some people to 'point out' that millions are being supposedly 'wasted' on advertising - however where would we be without all that vanity ?? Where would the gay community be without vanity ?? I could only imagine nights out where no one looks at each other. (gosh.. and wouldn't that be boring... might as well have a 'bingo competition' on who goes home with whom).

Quote:

Happiness and self respect don’t only come to gym bunnies. It is about realizing that you are beautiful just the way you are

Gee... I wish that was it in a nutshell. But it isnt. Beauty isn't always within.

I train 6 mornings a week, and continue to 'struggle' with trying to drop the weight. Why am I doing it ?? 1) Health - if anyone thinkgs that overweight = happiness then wake up to yourself, 2) Appearances - what I look like and what I can wear (and I'm sure that we all may struggle with that), and 3) to find someone to be with - the hardest thing to achieve - as the first two are in your control, but the last isnt.


Thanks Shannon for saying that 'your fat' - you definitely are not - but maybe if you and your mates walked in my shoes for a few days - you might have a bit more of an understanding.



and a side note : if there is anyone on here wanting to lose weight and needs some support - then drop me a line !

Quote:

Originally Posted by sati54

I wish I could get fat... lol. I cannot put on weight at all.

Just wait.

I was slim and gorgeous once, right up until I was about 30 and that was when the shit started hitting the fan from all directions. It starts off slowly, one day your a 32 inch waist and the next your squeezing your hideously fat, ugly arse into a pair of 34" jeans. By the time I was 40 I couldn't find a designer anywhere on the planet prepared to risk their reputation making pants to accommodate someone with an arse as fat and hideous as mine. Coincidentally that was about the time I officially became an alcoholic... and discovered designer tracksuits.