Hey, im 18 and gay. I've never told anyone about my sexuality, and im not sure if i want to. I guess i'd feel more free if i did, but i just wouldnt know how i would go about it, or how i would bring it up, particularly to my parents (who are very religious catholics

everyone will have an opinon on this.

Some will say be honest with your parents others will say to keep the peace keep it to yourself.

You dont HAVE to tell anyone but for your best friends it would be wise as you then have someone you can talk to. Of course some may
not like that you are gay.

I gather you have no gay friends at the moment ?

Posters do make friends on here and you can PM each other or phone each other.

When and how to bring it up will probably just present itself to you one day and out you will come with it. Def dont stew over when and how
as those scenarios that go through your head usually never work out that way.

Enjoy the site ! plenty of us gay types here

I think you have accepted who you are, and that's really the first, but most important step of all. Don't feel pressured to come out. You will do it when you think the timing is right- you may just blurt it out someday. Meanwhile, enjoy, and when you need some gay peers/advice, we're all ears.

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheOldie

everyone will have an opinon on this.

Some will say be honest with your parents others will say to keep the peace keep it to yourself.

You dont HAVE to tell anyone but for your best friends it would be wise as you then have someone you can talk to. Of course some may
not like that you are gay.

I gather you have no gay friends at the moment ?

Posters do make friends on here and you can PM each other or phone each other.

When and how to bring it up will probably just present itself to you one day and out you will come with it. Def dont stew over when and how
as those scenarios that go through your head usually never work out that way.

Enjoy the site ! plenty of us gay types here

Posters do make friends on here and you can PM each other or phone each other - Unless theyre dying of a terminal illness!!

i think the most important thing is you must accepte yourself ,as a chinese ,i wish everything will be allright with you !

Would have to agree with everything already said, come out when you feel comfortable, it can be now in a few years, whenever dont feel pressured at all.

Also fun facts for Catholics, its okay to be gay just not okay to have sex.

Hey dude, welcum to ss, if u ever need advice, just pm anyone on here, we would all love to help u

thanks guys. No, i dont have gay friends at the moment. Thats probably the hardest thing about being closeted... not having anyone who would understand to talk to about it. Thats why i dont want to tell even my closest straight friends. They'll either feel uncomfortable around me or ask stupid questions like, "so.. what, you'd never hook up with a girl, even if shes really hot?"
I was thinking of going to a gay bar, but it'd be kinda lame if i just went by myself...

Maybe make a few mates online and go with them? Probably better to get to know them well enough first though. Oddly I found having gay friends helped my coming out. I had mates I loved and cared about on both sides of the fence.

Anyway I'd add advice, but the guys posting above have given some primo advice so I don't feel the need to add to it. I just wish you all the best and want to say one more thing, never be ashamed of who you are. :]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zepol23

Also fun facts for Catholics, its okay to be gay just not okay to have sex.

Reminds me of the priest that died at the world trade centre. He was openly gay, just never slept with anyone. Now thats devotion.

Quote:

Originally Posted by luvbears

thanks guys. No, i dont have gay friends at the moment. Thats probably the hardest thing about being closeted... not having anyone who would understand to talk to about it. Thats why i dont want to tell even my closest straight friends. They'll either feel uncomfortable around me or ask stupid questions like, "so.. what, you'd never hook up with a girl, even if shes really hot?"
I was thinking of going to a gay bar, but it'd be kinda lame if i just went by myself...

sounds like a plan

you can make online friends here to chat about things. PM someone if more personal questions

maybe come out to your friends further down the track when they have matured more just dont feel you have to or let yourself
be forced into coming out. The right time/place will present itself. Quite a few of us are from country towns and never came
out to friends back home. I didnt as moved to Sydney to work and we never kept in touch much except if I ran into them when I went back home and you just dont walk up to people in the streets and blurt it out.

and if you plan a trip to Sydney or Melbourne try and work it in with a SameSame meet up. Then you wont be along when you
go to the bars.

I wouldnt go to a gay bar by myself for the first time, make some friends off here first or something as everyone else has said.

start coming out of the closet you will be happier and better for it

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zepol23

I wouldnt go to a gay bar by myself for the first time, make some friends off here first or something as everyone else has said.

Lol tell me about it. I' haven't been to one gay club yet. Lol :/ :P

Same Same Media Player

John Waters: Coming Out Is So Square - YouTube

try not to worry about it. or relent to any pressure you may experience. people make it into too big an issue.

as others have said it is important however to have someone to talk to though.

yay for the internet.

is there anyone at school you've heard rumors about or you suspect might be queer?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zepol23

I wouldnt go to a gay bar by myself for the first time, make some friends off here first or something as everyone else has said.

Why's that?

Quote:

Originally Posted by luvbears

Why's that?

I think if i had i wouldve been generally uncomfortable or overwhelmed by it all but thats just me .

well, im assuming that all of u are open about it. How'd you go about telling people and how did they react?

I told the biggest gossip that I knew when I first came out as gay 2 days later the whole town knew.

G'day Luvbears, you could ask 1000 gay guys how they come out and get 1000 different answers. lol

Seriously though. You'll be okay and things will sort out soon enough. It can be hard to 'come out' and I think the most important thing is to have strength and confidence in yourself first. Making some gay friends may help you in that regard because you will have some moral support.

I always liked the boys and had a great time when I was young with my mates. I didn't 'come out' until I was 24, as I was worried what my family would think of me. When my 3rd boyfriend moved in with me it got to the point I had to deal with the elephant in the room. When I broke the news, I remember Dad took a couple of sleeping pills and went to bed, Mum was a bit cross at me for not saying something sooner and my sister was wrapped. An awkward few weeks followed. Months later it was a complete non-event and I wondered what I was worried about all those years before. Dad would be sitting on the couch having a beer with my bf talking about cars and Mum was telling the lady down the shops her son was gay. lol

Quote:

Originally Posted by badtrany

I told the biggest gossip that I knew when I first came out as gay 2 days later the whole town knew.

Wise decision, wish i did the same now haha

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zepol23

Wise decision, wish i did the same now haha

What's holding you back?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wonderland

What's holding you back?

im out already, its old news.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zepol23

im out already, its old news.

Oops, my mistake

the main problem is that im constantly surrounded by catholics! If i told my parents, im sure they wouldnt neglect me or anything, but theyd strongly discourage me to have a boyfriend or have gay sex. Theyd hope for me to remain single and never have sex, or become a priest. FUCK THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So basically i had to choose between homosexuality and christianity, and the choice seems to be quite clear to me..

Quote:

Originally Posted by luvbears

Theyd hope for me to remain single and never have sex, or become a priest. FUCK THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

or you could blow th local priest

srsly tho, welcome to ss and u dont have to do everything @ once, just chill and give time time (cliched (or clicked as bobby would say ) i know - but true)

have fun on th journey

pete

Quote:

Originally Posted by luvbears

the main problem is that im constantly surrounded by catholics! If i told my parents, im sure they wouldnt neglect me or anything, but theyd strongly discourage me to have a boyfriend or have gay sex. Theyd hope for me to remain single and never have sex, or become a priest. FUCK THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So basically i had to choose between homosexuality and christianity, and the choice seems to be quite clear to me..

You do know you can be both lolz.

ok, just to get the facts straight, even if i was straight, thers no way in the world id bcome a priest! Wouldnt wanna put my balls to waste lol... Which reminds me...
Why do priests wear undies in the shower?
So they dnt have to look at the unemployed!

good advice so far well done everyone.

Welcome :-)