X Factor's gay dad misses hiskids

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Before launching into his own rendition of Elton John’s Rocket Man, this X Factor contestant tugged at the nation’s heartstrings, bravely sharing his tale of parental heartbreak.

“This is rather personal, but I have three children who I haven’t seen for a very long time,” began 41-year-old Queenslander Justin Standley on last night’s episode.

“I was with a woman when I was very young – we had three children. There was so much tension. I ended up leaving that relationship… and she broke off all contact. It’s made it impossible to find them.

“Very soon after that was when I realised that I’m gay. And that instilled in me a belief that maybe I didn’t deserve a connection with my children.”

He told the judges: “I know this is crazy, but I thought if I got over my nerves and my shyness, came up here and sang well enough, then perhaps they would see me on TV and feel proud of their dad.”

He says he hasn’t seen his children for twelve years, but thinks about them every day.

“All I really want to say to them is that I’ve always loved them.”

Take a look at Standley’s X Factor audition on the clip below.


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So it was a resounding “yes!” from all four judges. And following Standley’s audition, support for him flooded into the show’s official Facebook page, where a photo of him received over 10,000 ‘likes’, along with hundreds of messages like this one:

“I hope you find your children. The power of music can move mountains, let’s hope your children see it.”

The X Factor continues each Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday at 7:30pm on 7.

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yogi

yogi said on the 23rd Aug, 2012

You all need to have more compassion. I feel for Justin so much, I know how he feels, how? Because I have lived & am living through a very simular story to his. This is not a simple black & white problem, there are so many factors to consider, there are many sides to this story, but I for one know, that a woman can get very nasty, resentful, scheming & bitter when it comes to ending & marriage or relationship, even more so when the man comes out as being gay or leaves her for another man. Woman has 90% of all rights when it comes to children, the mother can make it so hard for the father that it becomes imposible to be able to be a father. The father can go to court & fight for his children (which he should not have to do) however, unless you have lots of money & want to spend 16 to 18 years of your life fighting her & the courts, sending your self broke & having no life of your own, well then you may get a chance, however, most fathers don't. It certainly does not help either if you are gay, the mother will & does use that against you in any court action. It is quite easy for a mother to rid the father out of their children's life's if she wants to.

As for child support, you can not get away with out paying child support in Australia, at least not for long anyway, Australia has some of the hardest child support laws in the world, the child support agency is ruthless, very difficult & very hard on fathers. Justin would be paying child support, he carn't not pay. What really sucks is, the father must pay no matter what, yet the mother can make it very hard or even stop you from seeing your children, yet the father still must pay child support.

So unless you are in this situation, or you are close to someone who is, my words to anyone that want to criticize Justin or any father, straight or gay, is to STFU, because unless you have walked in their shoes, you have no idea what it is like or how hard it can be for fathers.

The suicide rate for fathers from broken relationships is very high, which I can totally understand, because between a nasty mother & the courts geared always be in favor of the mother, it gets to a point when you just want it to end, as there is nothing more painful then someone or someones stoping you or telling you that you can not see your own flesh & blood (children) especially when you have been nothing but good to your children, it rips your heart out!

There is very little support for gay dads out there, which includes our very own gay community, so we should be giving Justin all the support we can, as he needs it. Lets not judge him, lets open our hearts to him.

Mama Catastrophe

Mama Catastrophe said on the 23rd Aug, 2012

You all need to have more compassion. I feel for Justin so much, I know how he feels, how? Because I have lived & am living through a very simular story to his. This is not a simple black & white problem, there are so many factors to consider, there are many sides to this story, but I for one know, that a woman can get very nasty, resentful, scheming & bitter when it comes to ending & marriage or relationship, even more so when the man comes out as being gay or leaves her for another man. Woman has 90% of all rights when it comes to children, the mother can make it so hard for the father that it becomes imposible to be able to be a father. The father can go to court & fight for his children (which he should not have to do) however, unless you have lots of money & want to spend 16 to 18 years of your life fighting her & the courts, sending your self broke & having no life of your own, well then you may get a chance, however, most fathers don't. It certainly does not help either if you are gay, the mother will & does use that against you in any court action. It is quite easy for a mother to rid the father out of their children's life's if she wants to.

As for child support, you can not get away with out paying child support in Australia, at least not for long anyway, Australia has some of the hardest child support laws in the world, the child support agency is ruthless, very difficult & very hard on fathers. Justin would be paying child support, he carn't not pay. What really sucks is, the father must pay no matter what, yet the mother can make it very hard or even stop you from seeing your children, yet the father still must pay child support.

So unless you are in this situation, or you are close to someone who is, my words to anyone that want to criticize Justin or any father, straight or gay, is to STFU, because unless you have walked in their shoes, you have no idea what it is like or how hard it can be for fathers.

The suicide rate for fathers from broken relationships is very high, which I can totally understand, because between a nasty mother & the courts geared always be in favor of the mother, it gets to a point when you just want it to end, as there is nothing more painful then someone or someones stoping you or telling you that you can not see your own flesh & blood (children) especially when you have been nothing but good to your children, it rips your heart out!

There is very little support for gay dads out there, which includes our very own gay community, so we should be giving Justin all the support we can, as he needs it. Lets not judge him, lets open our hearts to him.

Hmm are we still talking about this guys story or yours?

yogi

yogi said on the 27th Aug, 2012



Well it's clear the guy can sing, so it's not like he is just on the show for one thing, he is not using the show for sympathy, he is just bringing attention to some thing that effects a lot of gay men, which needs to be talked about more in our commuity, instead of Kylie all the time. Sadly our gay commity likes to pretend these kind of problems are not there, as it's not part of the "gay" culture. A lot of gays are in their own little world, if it does not effect me, so why should I care, right? It' a very selfish attitude, which is one of the biggest failers of the gay commuity & the youth, if it does not effect me, well i dont care or ill turn a blind eye to it , & even judge somone, when in fact we know nothing about what we are judging. I agee there is a bit of an over kill on these shows at times of sad stories, however there is a lot of good stories as well, but we tend to hang on & critizise the sad ones. Everybody has a story, good or bad, & we like to be able to tell our story & be heard, its important to our mental heath to tell our story, how one takes that story is up to them. But, we must always think out side our own little box & think it should only be one way, the way I think, which is norrow minded & provokes limited thoughts. Justin has most likely done everything in is power to find his children, this would be his last resort. He also may have limited resources & money. Unless we know what he has or has not done, we should not be passing negative uninformed judgement. The show can do what it likes, if someone does not like it, then don't watch it. When a person is opening their heart & telling others of a very personal painful story, yet others judge & criticize them, shows a major lack of compassion within them selfs, unfortunately I find this a lot in the gay community, it's sad, because compassion is fundermental to our own happiness.